Today & Tomorrow

1st Annual University of Miami “Elements of Spring Breakdown” featuring live performances by Afu Ra, DJ G Brown, DJ Epps and various MC and DJ battles on the University Patio. Friday’s show is from 6:30-11 p.m. and Saturday’s is from 1:30-11 p.m. Admission is free for all ages. For more info call 305-284-2211.

Tonight

A “Tribute to the Cure” featuring live performances by Nasty Shahoulian and the Gimmix and seven other local bands at the Hard Rock Caf

I’m no coffee guru. I couldn’t tell an arabica bean from a black bean. But I know a good caf

While Miami offers a wide array of places to party, from a simple beer bar like the Tavern to the morning-after dance-party of Club Space, every now and then the more mature drinker finds the need to escape the crowd of fake IDs and deafening music and share a full bar only with friends.

This is not about an $800 bottle of vodka at special VIP tables that clubs offer. (Besides, many VIP areas are still drenched in loud music and cramp spaces.) Nor is it about spending just as much at a liquor store and recreating your own dorm-room-bar. This is about Gatsby’s, one of Miami’s few remaining hangouts classy enough to take even your most sophisticated out-of-town guests to, yet hip enough to satisfy even your more inattentive friends.

The reason is simple: While most popular clubs strive to be louder and flashier than each other, Gatsby’s strives to cater to your specific needs. They have over 40 selections of wines by the glass and two full-liquor bars, 60 assorted beers and microbeers (20 on draft), seven giant television screens, 13 regulation size Brunswick pool tables, private party rooms, “The Fitzgerald Room” (a cigar and martini lounge), as well as an eclectic menu featuring tapas, gourmet thin crust pizzas, specialty sandwiches and signature salads. If these don’t meet your fancy, try Gatsby’s nightly specials.

During its week-long happy hours, from 4 to 7 p.m., one can enjoy half- priced premium cocktails, draft beer and wine as well as half-priced pool tables and $4 gourmet pizzas. On Monday, Gatsby’s offers $0.25 cent clams and oysters. Tuesday is Gatsby’s draft party (4-11 p.m.), which includes half priced draft beer and all major sporting events on their seven giant televisions.

During Wednesday’s “Ladies’ Night” (7 p.m.-12 a.m.): Free pool and half priced drinks for all women. From 4 to 11p.m. on Thursdays, Gatsby’s offers half prices on their selection of 20 oversized martinis.

Naturally, you won’t be paying with spare change at Gatsby’s. It’s not cheapest ticket to getting hammered on the weekends- so if you’re the thrifty spender, you might want to capitalize on their daily specials. But if you’re looking for a classier atmosphere full of good food, great pool tables, a superb bar, and the most attentive staff, then Gatsby’s is worth trying.

Furthermore, if you’re the regular South Beach club-hopper tired of spending a few $100 on a bottle of liquor, parking, and a long drive to the beach, then Gatsby’s is definitely worth the try. You’ll save a lot on drinks, won’t have to wait in line to get them, won’t have to worry about parking, and won’t have to worry about losing any of your friends in the frenzy of a flashy night club scene.

Gatsby’s is located at 8575 S.W. 124th Ave. For more information, call 305-412-2220 or visit their website at www.gatsbysfl.com. Must be at least 21 to enter.

It is a rare case when a major motion picture dons the gusto and audacity of Death to Smoochy, and gets past movie executives creatively intact. The new film directed by Danny DeVito, which stars Edward Norton and Robin Williams, is a kinetically frantic and occasionally choppy comedy that bounces across the screen like a hyperactive cartoon, taking satirical shots at commercialism, children’s television, and political correctness.

“In terms of taking risks, that’s what life is all about, as an artist, filmmaker, painter or even if you plant gardens,” said DeVito in a telephone interview with the collegiate press. “It’s more exciting to take that risk as long as you don’t hurt anybody.”

Death to Smoochy is an expletive-laden comedy that aspires to dance with the dark side. It follows the rise of all-around nice guy Sheldon Mopes (Norton) and his kids’ show host alter ego Smoochy, a giddy fuscia-colored rhinoceros, in the corruptive wake of Saturday morning’s old king, Randolph Smiley (Williams).

Smiley enlightened the minds of kids as Rainbow Randolph before he was caught accepting bribes from parents to put their children on his mega popular program. As his star and sanity quickly fizzle, Smoochy takes his place prancing around in the sing-a-long limelight. From here the plot basically spirals into an ego-and-liquor- fueled landslide of revenge that involves penis shaped cookies, the Irish mob, a Nazi conspiracy, hit men and heartbreak. Or as Williams’ character describes it, “I’m going on a safari motherfuc****, a saffaaaari!”

DeVito, the director of films like The War of the Roses and Throw Momma from the Train, is upbeat and confident about his latest film, and emphasized his desire for it to stay true to its original chaotic vision.

“I do tend to like films that stretch the envelope a little farther,” he said. “When I saw Smoochy, I thought it was really provocative and fun.

“The way I work is I take the script and I try to add my visuals to it. All of the little elements usually start with me and then the cinematographer and I collaborate on the colors and it becomes part of the pace…a collaboration of all of the artists.”

The way in which the film drenches sets ranging from Smoochy’s gaudy studio land to shadowy alleyways in contrasting dark and bright purples, blues and pinks, shares a similar style with less raunchy borderline comedies of the past like The Mask and Dick Tracy. In fact, Anastas Michos’ surreal cinematography, which helped stylize considerably different films like The Doors and Quiz Show, is the notable highlight in this film.

Death to Smoochy, for all of its oddball zeal, takes a few critical punches for having nearly zero character development and satirizing a topic that was long ago mined by writers on The Simpsons with Krusty the Clown and Sideshow Bob.

Yet, this doesn’t outweigh DeVito’s accomplishment in yielding another film that defies easy categorization and will intentionally trip up audiences. During a sneak preview at the Bill Cosford Cinema last week, a girl sitting in the theater asked her friend if the film was supposed to be funny. The tone of her voice suggested that she probably wasn’t able to comprehend the meaning of sarcasm, much less observe it in the film.

An employee at the office of The Miami Hurricane walked out impressed with some of the film’s arguable religious undertones. Other attendees were satisfied with the significant levels of dark comedy. DeVito deserves kudos for making an intelligent and well-rounded film while keeping the college audience in mind. This is a film definitely welcomed in face of more National Lampoon’s Frat Party 8.

When asked whether he preferred acting or directing, DeVito said that he enjoyed both tremendously, but would have to choose the latter. He explained how frustrating it has been throughout his career to make challenging films become a reality, such as 1975’s One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest. That film took years to develop and though DeVito appeared in it only as an actor, the award-winning final product inspired his passion to direct. Now when he directs a film of his own and it finally reaches theatres, he describes the feeling as an incomparable “release.” “Directing gives you the most juice from the fruit of this business,” he said.

Judging from the energy he exalts in Death to Smoochy, Williams might beg to differ. The enthusiasm expressed by Williams in his character’s blatant obsession with the f-word is almost a release in itself from the actor’s recent “minivan” films like Patch Adams and Flubber. Manically crashing into walls and spilling coffee on his character’s beloved genitals, Williams is able to run wild, leaping in and out of sanity like a dog through a hoop. He has described the role as “reverse therapy, someone who’s sliding quickly past the doors of Bettie Ford,” and repeatedly warned the film is “nasty funny.”

“This is def comedy Smoochy! Don’t bring anyone under thirty,” Williams jolted out in a morning phone interview.

With two pitch black roles on the way in the upcoming films One Hour Photo and Insomnia, which co-stars Al Pacino, and marks a return to doing stand-up comedy, this year looks to be one in which Williams will stray faraway from Disney-life and take some chances.

“There’s a need for a cathartic laugh. A desire to find a solution to all this madness going on,” Williams said, referring to the film’s need to push the limit to emanate humor.

While there’s little doubt that the desire and potential existed to make a bona fide classic comedy, in the end Death to Smoochy is a little a too loud. But overall, if you tally in the talented cast and an infinite assault of vulgar one liners the film is definitely more worthy of a movie ticket than a forgettable weekend rental.

What a dilemma.

It’s Friday, you’re itching for a SoBe night on the town, but you don’t have car, don’t want to ask your friend for yet another ride to the Beach, and cannot afford the $40 cab ride on top of the club cover.

Yes, Miami has probably one of the worst public transit systems on the east coast, but don’t fear. As bad as it may seem, it can cheaply and safely take you to the Beach late at night and bring you back at the crack of dawn.

Start off your trek on the Metrorail, which runs till midnight, and get off at the Government Center station in downtown Miami. Once there, walk about a block and a half from the station to the bus terminal, making your way through a a few of downtown’s wandering penniless denizens and Alzheimer’s patients.

From that platform you’ll take the S or Night Owl bus routes with an eclectic mix of tired Latin American nannies, construction workers, college students, drunkards, waiters and-occasionally-cheap call girls. The bus ride to the Beach is about 20 minutes long. A mild caveat: Don’t’ make the trip alone. While most of the homeless residents are harmless, you might run into an all-too persistent beggar who could give you a good scare.

Fortunately for those who favor late-night dinners and are on a budget constraint-or simply like to kick off the night way after midnight-a number SoBe’s kitchens are open as late as 2 a.m. A few are in full swing 24/7. Puerto de Sagua, on Seventh Street and Collins Avenue, has dinner specials starting off at about $6. I had a delectable chicken platter with rice and beans, a side of plantains. I also ordered a tres leches and caf

Where have the Black Rebel Motorcycle Club been for so long, when music has needed them so bad?

Well, doing the usual things young outlaws do: finishing their high school education, gigging at San Francisco and Los Angeles clubs, and listening extensively to Velvet Underground and Stone Roses albums.

A couple of years have passed and now it’s the perfect time for America and the rest of the world to get to know the B.R.M.C.’s fresh rock and roll. They are still young, rebellious, and severely influenced by Brit pop and N.Y.C.-style rock, but now they also have a debut, self-titled album out under Virgin Records, who unlike with most artists, have allowed them almost complete control over their music production and recording.

The San Francisco trio started playing together in November 1998, when high school friends guitarist and singer Peter Hayes, 23, and bassist Robert Turner,22, united with British drummer Nick Jago, 22. Soon enough, what was briefly given the title “the Bay Area’s best kept secret,” the B.R.M.C. started receiving calls from record companies and appraisals from recognized musicians like Oasis’ Liam Gallagher and The Smiths’ Johnny Marr, due to their 1999 independently-produced 13 song demo and their local shows.

After signing with Virgin Records and recording their debut, they were immediately invited to join the Dandy Warhols on tour throughout the U.S. and also played in the 2001 Sundance Festival with other accomplished acts.

Mere days after the band finished mixing their self-produced debut, they were asked to join the Dandy Warhols on several U.S. tours. They were also invited to play the 2001 Sundance Festival alongside some of the most interesting acts in the business.

The B.R.M.C.’s music takes the best of different genres and combines them in a melodic, ominous noise. They resemble a mix of the 1970s hard rock of Led Zeppelin, 1990s Brit pop, like the Manic Street Preachers, to a slight New Wave influence from Joy Division and Depeche Mode.

“We make the music we like and enjoy, and hope people will give it a chance,” says Turner. That should not be a concern for B.R.M.C. Like fellow new artists The Strokes, they have rapidly gained a large following, a lot of media attention and critical acclaim. Currently the B.R.M.C. are supporting Spiritualized on their April U.S. tour.

David Fincher’s Panic Room doesn’t really bring anything new to the suspense genre, but it does bring something that many directors of this genre have recently forgot: how to keep a viewer on the edge of their seat.

Most of today’s so-called thrillers contain the same labored and arbitrary setup, a series of implausible events leading up to a final shootout where (A) you can’t tell half of what goes on, and (B) it doesn’t matter because you know exactly what’s going to happen. Panic Room thankfully cuts through most of the lame setup, getting to the suspense earlier, and more importantly, prides itself on being a plausible and smart thriller, up until the final two scenes.

The little setup is this: Meg Altman (Jodie Foster) and her daughter Sarah (Kristen Stewart) embark on a tour of a large brownstone in West Manhattan. This isn’t just your basic home, though, as Meg would find out when she discovers the “panic room,” a small cubicle designed to keep invaders astray, equipped with steel doors, more than a dozen security cameras and supplies that allow occupants to spend some quality time there if need be.

That night, the burglars intrude the Altman’s new home. There are three of them: Burnham (Forest Whitaker), who spent 12 years “working on rooms like this specifically to keep out people like us,” Junior (Jared Leto), the man with the information, and Raoul (Dwight Yoakam), the man with the gun. We already know that this will be a smart film when, rather than the usual unconventional ways of breaking in and making noise, the burglars are careful to enter unnoticed.

The burglars hear of a $3-million treasure in the home. Problem is, the treasure is in the panic room. Meg and Sarah, who were quick to realize that there were invaders, hide in the room. But the burglars cannot get into the room and the two camps are confined to a chess game, as they try to outsmart each other.

This situation brings up a challenge for Fincher and screenwriter David Koepp. We know that the burglars are not going to kill Meg and Sarah because they wouldn’t be able to get into the room. So, how do you create pure suspense and terror when you know the heroes lives are at stake?

I won’t say much, although I will say part of the problem is solved by spending a lot of time with the burglars.

Burnham is the smartest of the three, yet the most insecure of his actions. Junior seemed to be useless after supplying the information, and Raoul is simply a wildcard. This is a film that not only creates real characters for the bad guys, but also makes us unsure of their motives– and them unsure of their own.

Fincher’s camerawork is masterful, reminding us of early Brian DePalma. This is a director (The Game, Seven, Fight Club) who always has control of his revolving camera, showing us every detail of what goes on. I’m always grateful for films that actually show us how the burglars go about their process, and Panic Room offers the best details of a robbery since last summer’s highly underrated The Score.

Everything leads to a conclusion that stays true to the setup, up until the last scene, where someone’s surprise motive creates the most implausible event in the movie.

Another obligatory shot, probably added on by the studio, is flat and unconvincing. Yet, for the rest of its 112 minutes, Panic Room is a creepy thriller that is more intelligent and technically polished than most of its counterparts. Fincher takes familiar material and puts his own touch on it, one where the audience is forced to become involved in the mystery in order to get the full impact. Panic Room is the type of film that will hopefully show Hollywood that smart thrillers can still be made.