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POLICE BEAT

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Pick up the paper every Friday to read the Public Safety call log and learn ways to protect yourself and your belongings.

Apartments and Eaton Residential College
Officer Maria Garcia

Hecht Residential College
Officer Juan Cuerdo

Mahoney Residential College
Officer Joel Veiguela

Pearson Residential College
Officer Brian Sirak

WEDNESDAY SEPTEMBER 24

1:40 a.m. 1311 Miller Dr. Grand Theft Auto
9:21 p.m. 1239 Dickinson Dr. Grand Theft

THURSDAY SEPTEMBER 25
11:54 a.m. 1241 Dickinson Dr. Grand Theft
3:39 p.m. 1301 Memorial Dr. Theft
5:05 p.m. 1245 Walsh Ave. Burglary
10:28 p.m. 5665 Ponce de Leon Petit Theft

FRIDAY SEPTEMBER 26

2:17 p.m. 5638 Memorial Dr. Criminal Mischief
7:30 p.m. 1221 Walsh Ave. Theft
8:18 p.m. 1241 Dickinson Dr. Theft

SATURDAY SEPTEMBER 27
3:27 a.m. 5900 San Amaro Dr. Aggravated Battery
SUNDAY SEPTEMBER 28
4:05 a.m. 1231 Dickinson Dr. Possession of Marijuana

MONDAY SEPTEMBER 29
2:24 p.m. 1206 Stanford Dr. Theft

TUESDAY SEPTEMBER 30
1:35 a.m. 1101 Stanford Dr. Battery
10:08 a.m. 5638 Merrick Dr. Theft
10:08 a.m. 1101 Stanford Dr. Theft
10:32 a.m. 1231 Dickinson Dr. Burglary
2:28 p.m. 1244 Stanford Dr. Petit Theft
4:40 p.m. 1228 Dickinson Dr. Harassing Phone Calls

Life, love, music

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It’s not every day you get a message on your cell phone telling you that you’ve won $5000 and a trip to Los Angeles. But for senior Jaide Fried, that’s exactly what happened the day she found out she won first place in the 2003 BMI Foundation’s John Lennon Scholarship competition.

Her song, “Love Me Tonight,” was written when Fried was 14 and thinking about her first crush. Throughout the years, it was recorded three times: first as a pop song, then as a rock version with a band and finally with just Fried and her piano.

Although “Love Me Tonight” had been entered in the contest in its previous forms, it was the final version that caught the attention of the judges.

“Her music is simple, yet deep and, most importantly, believable,” said Rey Sanchez, who served on the committee that picked Fried to represent UM at the national level. “At the end, the committee just had a gut feeling about Jaide’s song and this time we were right.”

Fried’s music, described by Professor Fred DeSena as a “kind of jazzy pop with a lot of heart,” places emphasis on both musical and lyrical content:

“You don’t have to worry ’cause you know I’ll be there/ wear something nice ’cause I love what you wear/ don’t worry ’bout the neighbors ’cause they don’t really care.”

Fried says she writes without a goal in mind, rather with a drive to experience the artistic journey that comes along with songwriting.

“When I’m finally finished it’s more heartfelt because it’s more about expressing something that is part of human nature and the human experience here on earth,” Fried said.

In addition to the scholarship, Fried was flown to Los Angeles with her mother and grandmother to attend the BMI Pop Music Awards held May 13.

Among those attending the ceremony were Vanessa Carlton, Nickelback, the writers and producers of Ja-Rule, and Barry Gordy, owner of Motown Records.

“Love Me Tonight” was played at the ceremony and Fried was honored onstage.

“The BMI foundation is dedicated to encouraging young and talented musicians that have not yet been exposed to the commercial music industry,” Ralph Jackson, president of the BMI foundation, said. “Jaide is a perfect example of that; all you have to do is meet her and you know that she has talent and success written all over her.”

As the first female to have won first place at UM for the particular competition, Fried is enthusiastic about the growing success of women in music, and excited about what the scholarship means for the industry.

“The industry is changing, and music is getting more sophisticated,” Fried said. “[The judges] chose the type of music that appeals to an audience more interested in lyrics that tell a story than just music that sets a groove and a feel.”

“It gives intellectual as well as emotional stimulation,” Fried said.

“When I first found out that I’d won the award, I was a little skeptical before I realized it was actually true,” Fried said. “To me, it’s an affirmation that songwriting is something I should be doing, something that I have a talent for and a gift that I should share with others.”

Natalia Maldonado can be contacted at n.Maldonado@umiami.edu

Elements of the STORM: Homecoming watch in effect at UM

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This year’s Homecoming theme is in (drum roll, please), and it is: Elements of the Storm.
Opening ceremonies are scheduled to take place on Halloween at the Rathskeller.
The 18 days of Homecoming are expected to continue the tradition of contests and spirit at UM, with events including Mr. and Ms. UM competitions, Homecoming ball, a blood drive, a parade and the Homecoming football game, among other events.
Various organizations, both Greek and non-Greek, show their spirit by having their members present and involved in the different events as well as by entering in the different contests for a chance to make their organization the best.
Then the Homecoming committee votes on the organization that has displayed the most spirit, sportsmanship and pride to win the Homecoming spirit award.
“The goal is to promote school spirit because this is our time to shine as students and it is what we will remember when we leave the University of Miami,” Robert Castro, executive chair of the Homecoming Committee, said.
According to some students, Homecoming is an opportunity for students to show they care.
“Often when doing volunteer work, you can’t see the difference that you are making, but with so many people participating, the difference is obvious,” Valerie Roseman, junior, said. “It’s nice to see students go against the norm and wake up early to help others out.”
Still, many students see the emphasis on sororities and fraternities during Homecoming as a way to separate Greeks from non-Greeks.
“Homecoming caters too much to fraternities and sororities,” Karla Cato, senior, said. “What it should do is encourage more participation from all groups, regardless of affiliation, to get everyone involved.”
The general consensus amongst students, however, is that in the end it boils down to the excitement that goes along with hoping UM will win the Homecoming football game.
“This is our chance to show everybody that we are bad asses,” Cori Williams, senior, said.
To be a part of the Homecoming executive committee next year or for more information, contact Robert Castro at 305-284-2805.

Erin Wright can be contacted at e.wright@umsis.miami.edu

UMTV wins SPJ award

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The Society of Professional Journalists [SPJ] has named NewsVision, the twice-weekly news broadcast of the UM School of Communication, as “Best Non-Daily College Newscast” in the country.

The news program competed with over 2,700 entries in the SPJ “Mark of Excellence” award competition.

According to NewsVision staff, the show had to produce an entire year’s worth of top-notch shows to win the award because judges review three random newscasts taped at various times throughout the year, so students must be consistently excellent in what they produce.

“One of the first things that came to mind when I heard that we had won the award was, ‘Wow! First in the country? We’re ranked higher than the football team,'” Stephen Webster, this year’s executive producer of NewsVision, said

NewsVision, which is run entirely by students, has consistently won less-prominent awards at the SPJ competition. Last year was the first season that the broadcast had been good enough to compete for an honor of this caliber.

“In past years, we’ve had a few good shows,” said Andy Barton, news content advisor for UMTV. “This year, I’d say over 90 percent of our shows were just outstanding.”

“I feel like everybody who participated in that particular year collectively wanted to be the best, and that pushed us over the top,” Webster said. “There was no settling for second place.”

Webster and Barton, along with Jessica Kiss, David Hamilton, Alina Masenya and Maureen Capasso, were also responsible for the production and anchoring of last year’s show.

Capasso, last year’s executive producer, was a chief player behind the scenes. She routinely spent 10-hour days making sure that even when news was slow, there was still excellent broadcasting that held viewers’ interest.

Capasso graduated last year and now works for CBS Channel 4 in Miami, where she is being trained in production.

“Maureen was one of the most dedicated broadcast students I’ve seen in my three years here, in terms of behind-the-scenes work,” said Barton.

She was also responsible for the 2003 Emmy Award that NewsVision won from the Suncoast Chapter of The National Academy of Television Arts and Sciences [NATAS], a regional nonprofit organization dedicated to excellence in television that typically recognizes professional journalism.

NewsVision was the sole winner in the category of “Student Productions”, which was handed out December of last year. Capasso worked alongside recent graduate Garret Russo and Kyle Berger to win the Emmy.

SPJ has also recognized Jordan Rodack, former editor in chief of The Miami Hurricane, at the 2003 National Convention. He received the “Ethics in Journalism” award for the paper’s coverage of the Sept. 11 attacks and his ensuing resignation from the Alpha Epsilon Phi [AEPi] fraternity following repeated harassment by AEPi members after he made a decision to print an article that reflected negatively on the fraternity.

“It was a tough time, but it’s something that I look back on, and am very proud of,” Rodack said. “When all this happened I wasn’t looking, expecting or hoping for any sort of recognition. I stayed true to what I believe.”

For more information on UMTV visit www.miami.edu/umtv.

Jillian Bandes can be contacted at j.bandes@umiami.edu.

NEWS BRIEFS

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Spots open for trip to FSU game
Spots are still available for the UM vs. FSU trip package! The package includes hotel, bus ride to and from Tallahassee, game ticket and a t-shirt. This is an all or none deal. Students must ride on the bus both ways. The bus will leave Friday, Oct. 10 at 9 a.m., returning Sunday, Oct. 12. All students must be of graduate or undergraduate status, and have paid the student activity fee. For more information, call 305-284-3082.

Nominate Leader of the Month
Do you know any great student leaders? Has someone worked really hard in your organization? Then nominate them for Student Leader of the Month. Nomination forms are available in UC 209 and are due by Oct. 8 at 5 p.m.

Chick-fil-A drive-thru best in U.S.
QSR magazine has just released its annual “Best Drive-Thru in America” rankings. The results may actually surprise you. The top 10 overall rankings are: 1. Chick-fil-A, 2. Taco Bell, 3. Wendy’s, 4. Burger King, 5. El Pollo Loco, 6. Jack In The Box, 7. Taco John’s, 8. Arby’s, 9. KFC and 10. Checkers.
Hip Hop night hits Titanic brewery
Are your Tuesday nights a little dull? If so, stop by Titanic for Hip Hop night featuring DJ Boe 63rd and guest DJ Kurt J. Random spinning from 9 p.m. to 1 a.m., with open mic from 11:30 p.m. to 1 a.m.

Tri Delta hosts golf fundraiser
Delta Delta Delta will be holding its first annual Tees Fore Tots charity golf tournament to raise money for St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital. The tournament will be held on Sunday, Oct. 19 at 1 p.m. and includes 18 holes of golf, tons of prizes and a banquet and awards ceremony after the tournament! Cost is $75 for non-UM affiliates and $65 with a ‘Cane card. Registration is due by Oct. 12. For more information, contact Nichole Starr at ayla306@aol.com.

Mousepads here for survey-takers
If you are a first-year commuter student who attended orientation and filled out the CIRP survey, please stop by the Orientation and Commuter Student Affairs Office in UC 236 to pick up your complimentary mousepad that has your name on it. For more information, contact 305-284-5646.

CALENDAR

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TODAY

Dress in white and attend Safespace Foundation’s second annual Domestic Violence Awareness March at 12 p.m. at Bayfront Park. This march, in memory of Gladys Ricart and all victims of domestic violence, seeks to raise awareness about domestic violence. Speakers include Alex Penelas, mayor of Miami-Dade County, Manny Diaz, mayor of the City of Miami, and many more. Miami-Dade Transit is offering free rides to Bayfront Park on Metro-Rail and Metro Mover from 11:30 a.m. to 2:30 p.m. to people wearing white.

Want to know which platinum selling hip-hop artist will be performing at Hurricane Howl on Nov. 7? Then make sure to be at the Rat at 6 p.m. as Hurricane Productions makes the highly anticipated announcement. Stay at the Rat for Urban Freaky Friday and watch the freestyle battle hosted by Jin, the newest Ruff Ryder, until 8 p.m. There will be food and drink specials all night. For more information visit www.um-hp.com.

SATURDAY OCTOBER 4

LINK will be working with Habitat for Humanity to build homes for people in need in the community as a part of National Gandhi Day of Service. If you are interested in participating, meet at the Rock at 8 a.m. Please wear sneakers and pants, and if you have a hammer please bring it along as well. Come have fun building a house while helping out a great cause.

Don’t miss Slam Jam 2003 at the Wellness Center. Tip-off is at 12 p.m.

TUESDAY OCTOBER 7

Hispanic Heritage Month presents Chasing Papi at Cosford Cinema at 8 p.m.

WEDNESDAY OCTOBER 8

The University of Miami Alumni Association and Toppel Career Center will host a special panel discussion in celebration of Hispanic Heritage Month titled, “Job Market strategies from successful Hispanic Alumni.” The program will take place at 6:30 p.m. in the Toppel Career Center. For more information, contact Jamie Kaminetsky at 305-284-2872

C.A.C presents The Matrix Reloaded at Cosford Cinema at 8 and 10 p.m.

Solutions Interdisciplinary Forum and the UM Philosophy Club host a dynamic and interactive discussion on “Free will and Determinism” from 6:30 to 8 p.m. in Cox 145. Guests include Dr. Harvey Siegel (philosophy), Dr. Keith Lehrer (philosophy) and Dr. David Wilson (biology). For more information, contact solutions.studorg@miami.edu.

THURSDAY OCTOBER 9

Eaton Residential College presents an hour with Janet Reno at 7 p.m. Come for an informal question and answer session with our former U.S. Attorney General.

Hurricane Productions presents Patio Jams with Council of the Sun from 12 to 1:30 p.m.

Got questions about depression? Come to the breezeway from 11 a.m. to 2 p.m. and get a depression screening. For more information, contact the Counseling Center at 305-284-5511.

La Casa Cultural, Theater Arts, African American and Latin American Studies and the Foreign Literature and Language Department present Dominicanish by Josefina Baez, an Afro-Dominican performance artist, at Pearson Residential College at 8 p.m.

Don’t forget your Thirsty Thursdays mug for half-off drinks at the Rat from 7 to 10 p.m.

SATURDAY OCTOBER 11

Join the Hispanic Heritage Month Committee and friends in a night of live music by Tito Puente Jr. and his 15 piece orchestra at Omni Colonnade Hotel from 8 p.m. to 12 a.m. Dinner will be provided. Doors open at 7:30 p.m. with dinner being served at 8 p.m. For more information, contact MSA at 305-284-2855.

he Wellness Center I celebrating their 8th annual Wellness Expo “Healthy Haunted House”. Everyone is encouraged to attend in costume. Don’t miss out on the live music by Unison, dance demonstrations, pumpkin decorating contest and prizes for the best costume. For more information, contact 284-6524.

MONDAY NOVEMBER 10

C.O.S.O presents Spirit of UM: Showing Love for your Alma Mater at 1 p.m. in UC 211.
at or get wet, there’s something going on for you.

SATURDAY August 30
United Black Students invite you to end the week by dancing the night away at the Rat from 10 p.m. to 2 a.m.

MONDAY September 1
No classes.

TUESDAY September 2
Catch the C.A.C Sneak Peak of Freshman Diaries at Cosford Cinema at 9 p.m. The new reality series from Showtime documents 12 freshman students at the University of Texas as they go through the ups and downs of college.

Hillel Jewish Student Organization invites you to a free Israel Interest dinner meeting at 6:30 p.m. at Hillel. This is your chance to help plan a great year of programming.

WEDNESDAY September 3
C.A.C presents Anger Management starring Adam Sandler and Jack Nicholson free for students at Cosford Cinema at 8 p.m.

The Wellness Center hosts an open house from 5 to 7 p.m. This is your chance to explore what the Wellness Center has to offer you.
THURSDAY September 4
Hurricane Productions Patio Jams presents Hash Brown, a funk-core unit for the new millennium, from 12 to 1:30 p.m.

Black student welcome reception at 6 p.m. in the UC Ballrooms.

Coming Out On Top

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OPEN ARMS UM community welcomes alternative lifestyles

In the wake of the U.S. Supreme Court’s recent decision to overturn anti-sodomy laws and the approval of the Episcopal Church’s first openly gay bishop, the national trend toward the acceptance of gay issues is becoming apparent. This is creating a buzz internationally as well, with the July approval of marriage-like legal status for gay couples in Buenos Aires, Argentina. The trend is also prevalent throughout campus.

“It would be hard to go here and be bigoted,” said Jarrod Stokes, president of SpectrUM, the on-campus student organization whose goal is to promote awareness on gay, lesbian, transgender and bisexual issues. “You would be in the minority to live off those prejudices.”

While Stokes admits that there has been the occasional derogatory comment or banner torn down, overall he feels that UM is very accepting and open. SpectrUM currently has approximately 60 members, and its membership continues to grow. There has also been an increase in straight membership this year, which is encouraged by the organization.

“UM is extremely supportive as a whole,” Dara Solomon, executive director of public relations for SpectrUM, said.

Students agree.

“I like Miami because people are more open with themselves and ideas,” Pooja Doshi, freshman, said. “In North Carolina, where I’m from, homosexuality is almost like a myth – people often don’t even acknowledge its presence.”

“Obviously, everywhere you go, people are going to disagree, but I think on this campus we are very accepting and embracing of gay issues,” Kylee Maywald, junior, said.

In April 2000, the University implemented a benefits plan for same-sex domestic life partners.

Under the Domestic Partner Benefits, domestic partners of eligible UM full-time faculty and staff can receive benefits already available to legally married couples. These benefits include health and dental insurance, survivor’s benefits, participation in tuition remission and access to the Wellness Center, libraries and UM sporting events.

While UM was among the first 20 percent of colleges in the nation to institute such a full range of benefits, Stanford University led the way in 1992 with the first program of this kind.

According to William J. Walsh, executive director of benefits administration, the human resources office at UM started researching the domestic partner issue when they contributed a chapter entitled “Human Resources in Higher Education” for the book College and University Business Administration.

Walsh said that what began as a simple addition to a book turned into the realization that a domestic benefits program would be a good addition to the benefits offered at UM, especially as a recruiting incentive for faculty and staff to come to UM.

Walsh said that initially there were “all sorts of dire predictions” for the program – fears that people would undermine the program or that the program would prove too costly.

“None of those bad predictions have come true,” Walsh said. Since its inception, the program has made no difference in costs.

Currently, there are 62 employees enrolled in the benefits program, making a total of 124 members. However, only 55 percent of this group is enrolled for the full range of benefits.

Additionally, since April 2000, there have been two dissolutions, analogous to “divorces” among the members.

For many, the stigma associated with homosexuality is clearly fading.

“Education and awareness is the key to acceptance,” Stokes said. “It’s not about promoting the ‘gay agenda,’ unless you consider wanting to be accepted and equal an agenda.”

Many students on campus feel that the increasing acceptance of gay couples and gay-related issues can be attributed in part to the media.

The hit TV show “Queer Eye for the Straight Guy” is a perfect example of this, according to students. The “Fabulous Five” are now a staple at celebrity events. And just a few weeks ago, Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera and Madonna created a spectacle when they kissed on stage during their performance at the MTV Video Music Awards. Comedians Gary Shandling and Brad Garrett followed that with their own on-stage kiss at the Emmy Awards on Sept. 21.

“A lot of the media attention is more for the shock value than support,” Solomon said. “But it shows that people have loosened up about the issue.”

“It’s becoming less of a niche issue,” Stokes said.

Next week, SpectrUM will be participating in National Coming Out Week from Oct. 6-11 with various guest speakers and activities. The organization encourages everyone, regardless of sexuality, to come out and take part in the events and ask any questions they may have.

“I’m just proud of the progress we have made,” Rayna Carter, member of SpectrUM, said. “And I hope it continues.”

For more information about Coming Out Week, contact Spectrum at 305-284-5520 or visit UC room 244, Monday through Friday from 11 a.m.-3 p.m.

Megha Garg can be contacted at mgarg@umsis.miami.edu.

L&A PARTY CALENDAR: Binge drink with Empirical Mile, Kill Bill bash (shinobis only), Radiohead make the world fold, chug an Irish Car Bomb(s)

By Hunter Stephenson & Omar Sommereyns, Life & Art Editors-at-Large

TONIGHT

A swimming pool, kegs, girls, boys and Empirical Mile, cough, The Empirical Mile, jammity jamming all nite long. For directions hit up EmpiricalMile.com. Water and electricity are always a good mix.

Before you read it in L&A and then, let’s say, two months later, read it in Street, why not check out Atropia Galleries, 2200 NW Second Ave., and their opening exhibit Urban Artchitexture featuring music by Clubkid. If you spaz out, you’ll see it here Tuesday. Booooooooooo!

Let the Kill Bill madness flood your mind. The Village Voice is calling this, “The Most Violent American Film Ever Made,” and Life & Art Film Critic Shawn Wines says it’s a, “Tour de Force. Non-stop action, I was on the edge of my seat!” No he didn’t. Go to Opium, 136 Collins Ave. for the official South Beach premiere, just in case QT and Uma decide to pop up for a sword fight.

SATURDAY

Get deep and swoon like the world’s collapsing to Radiohead. Thom and band are playing at the fittingly named Sound Advice Amphitheatre in West Palm Beach w/ charming Brits Supergrass. It’s probably sold out, unless you have press passes, but visit Ticketmaster.com for the info.

SUNDAY

Who needs school when you have Irish Car Bombs at Churchill’s Pub, 5501 NE 2nd Ave.? Punk rock jolly drunks the Vibrators w/ the Creepy T’s and the Hangovers, and Baby Dracula and…remember, this is Churchill’s…Mission X…and (the best band name ever ever ever?) Why Not? You can miss another class. Just think, “Why not?”

TUESDAY

Now that yr brain is mush from going to Churchill’s on Sunday (dude, what were you thinking?), expand what’s left at the “Free Will and Determinism” partaaay being thrown by the UM Philosophy Club and Solutions Interdisciplinary Forum. Go to the Cox building on campus, room 145 at 6:30 p.m. Because what is not simply cannot exist. Why not?

album reviews: Congratulations Thrice, you get zero stars!

Kevin Dean, and Ross Whitsett

___________________________________________________________

THE CLIENTELE
The Violet Hour
***

Occasionally, I’ll feel like sinking into a giant silky cushion and vanishing for a week or so, like in that scene in Trainspotting, where “Rent-Boy” shoots up and lolls onto a furry red carpet, then gets submerged and transported across the city. Yeah…something like that, but without Mr. Brownstone (don’t wanna get too indolent, do we?). And after listening to the Clientele for numerous hours, the mood’s been tempered down to a melodic lethargy that has come to envelop this depleted body. Man, my eyelids are getting heavy…

Don’t fall asleep though because this London trio creates dulcet psychedelic pop that gently caresses your ears, but shuns the corny imagery of multihued dreamscapes, a la Puffy AmiYumi. Instead, The Violet Hour, the band’s debut album following 2001’s Suburban Light EP, invokes pictures of misty blocks of streets overcome by sorrow and cascading autumn leaves. Guitarist/singer Alasdair MacLean, drummer Mark Keen and bassist James Hornsey polish their numinous riffs with reverbed vocals and ghostly airs that linger like herb smoke in your bedroom.

As the first track, “Violet Hour,” sets the tone, MacLean’s soured lyrics (“That summer […] I became cold”) and layered voice echoes throughout the tunes that smoothly meld with each other like butter and bread. While “Porcelain” is the only track that gets a bit rowdier with a pulsing bass pickup, “Lamplight” makes you turn your head at night and hear hallowed sounds emitted from a specter in the dark or, even more, “The House Always Wins,” with its fuzz guitars droning in doldrums, has an ethereal elegance that just won’t let go.

It’s not that these guys are doing anything new, but rather how they’ve been able to credibly emulate distinct sounds of ’60s groups like the Velvet Underground and The Byrds. It would be tricky to see them in concert though since this music is conducive to a drowsy, but pleasant state of being. Just don’t overplay this record and lay in bed all day like I do because you may never find a way out.

-Omar Sommereyns

____________________________________________________________

THRICE
The Artist in the Ambulance
No stars, as in 0 stars

Cody was the white trash James Dean of my fourth grade class. He never bathed, spat on girls and let his unkempt hair grow long and free in the back. Then, one morning, in a shocking series of events, Cody unknowingly launched a sting operation against the class’ most popular boy-toy, Keith. Scrawled across all of the bathroom’s stall doors was the message, “I did not do this. Keith did – Cody.” I was stunned, not because of the brilliancy of the smear campaign, but because the message had been written in purple fountain pen. Not just any purple fountain pen, though, but mine!

Cody eventually gave the pen back to me days later, but it didn’t matter, the energy and inspirational power of the pen had been stolen by Cody during his mission and it was never coming back. I never used it again after that day. More than anything, I wish Cody had stolen my pen, moved to San Diego, CA, and given it to the budding members of Thrice. They could use it to actually pen some decent songs, or to shove it up their stupid emo asses.

On their newest major label release, Virgin’s The Artist in the Ambulance, cluttered with guitar riffs and unnecessary screaming, they try to mask the fact that most of the songs were probably written while trying on some Etnies in the back of Pac Sun.

In the made-for-MTV-single “All That’s Left,” lead singer Dustin Kensure whines, “We tried to bleed the sickness / But we drained our hearts instead / We are the dead.” You’ll wish Kensure was getting fisted when he starts giving love advice. On “Don’t Tell And We Won’t Ask,” he offers, “If you’re a smart kid, you’ll stay the hell away from love.” Trite, nonetheless, but hopefully this is our guarantee that Thrice isn’t getting laid.

Nowadays, Cody probably listens to this album while cleaning his shotgun and planning for the day when he will finally shoot the President.

-Kevin Dean

____________________________________________________________

V/A
Lost In Translation
**

I got handed this disc with some excitement since it’s the soundtrack to the new Sophia Coppola film, her first since 1999’s Virgin Suicides. While Air created all the songs for that film, Lost In Translation features some British noise pop bands of the past and present. Soundtracks are unusual entities since they have to work with the film, but here, as a mix CD, we can consider this album on its own.

Let me now go on to tell you that this is one of the most disappointing pieces I have heard in quite a while. It’s all a mellow drawl of sparse ambiance with the most rewarding moments being just a few familiar songs. My Bloody Valentine’s ’91 classic “Sometimes,” “Just Like Honey” from Jesus and Mary Chain’s Psychocandy and the gorgeous spatial crescendo of Death in Vegas’ “Girls” from the completely ignored electronic maelstrom that was Scorpio Rising are the cheap moments of worth here, with little saving grace in the original pieces of the album.

The main contributor is Kevin Shields, proving here with his first original work since MBV, which was about 10 years ago, that he is the British version of Axl Rose and just about as relevant in this day and age. Since he’s been collaborating with Spacemen 3 burnout Sonic Boom in his ambient noise project Experiment Audio Research, I don’t know if he was sharing Sonic’s shrooms or just hid himself in his own stoned haze, but the work produced here is some monotonous dribble. “City Girl” tries to be his single, but just drones on like an MBV song that got left on the editing floor. “Goodbye” and “Are You Awake?” are tracks that Richard James (Aphex Twin) wouldn’t whip his ass with, especially with the latter utilizing some pathetic beats that can be gotten from any DJ computer program marketed today.

Damn it Kevin, what the hell were you doing all this time, did you listen to any music? On another end, Air gives a taste of what’s in store for Talkie Walkie, their proper follow-up to 10,000 Hz Legend due this January, with “Alone in Kyoto” – slow and atmospheric mood music with little payoff in attempts to make the song run like a roller-coaster with highs and lows about as satisfying as a ride in one of those kiddie trains in malls. I’m gonna stop here. See the movie, it kicks ass, but if you want a shoegazer/noise pop mix, try Creation Records: International Guardians of Rock & Roll, and leave this where it belongs – on the shelf.

-Ross Whitsett

film review: Kill Bill: Volume 1 ***1/2

Whatever worries people have about Quentin Tarantino’s long-awaited fourth film will be slashed to pieces in the first minutes alone. The bug-eyed, eccentric filmmaker has seemingly been running around Japan’s neon streets gobbling ecstasy since Jackie Brown came out in 1997, but his new film, Kill Bill, is destined to put his giant forehead back in the spotlight.

Tarantino helped spark the independent film revolution of the early ’90s with Reservoir Dogs, a tiny budget crime thriller that was just as concerned with being cool as it was with John Wooish blood lust. Thus, the Tarantino style was born, or, more accurately, it was finally revealed after years in the lab of a video store. The edgy, witty violence that Tarantino employs in most of his work comes from years of studying the films of Woo, Martin Scorsese, Brian DePalma, and countless foreign directors.

After Reservoir Dogs sounded out a bark heard all around the nation in 1992, QT pierced the pop culture stratosphere with Pulp Fiction, a beautiful collage of retro gunplay and witty, sexy banter between classically volatile characters. Pumping cash into Miramax like John Holmes, Fiction was also a college kid favorite at the Oscars, leaving Tarantino to party and go through showbiz dames like the then hot Mira Sorvino. Three years later, Jackie Brown, a respectable enough ode to blaxploitation, was released to the disappointment of many Cheeto-munching Net heads – it was simply too old skool slow dance for ordinary fans.

Jump a few years later, and we have Harry Knowles-propelled rumors about Tarantino’s newest film, a mega-tribute to the over-the-top martial arts chop-socky and spaghetti westerns he grew up on. For fans craving a hit of Tarantino’s brutality and rage it’s high strength smack. For those wishing to hear that customary snappy dialogue of yesteryear, well, as Sven Barth says, whommp whommp.

Screw the latter though, because Kill Bill is so fun to watch. The film has a wild child sense of humor about itself, and never hesitates to shower viewers with clever and entertaining references to Bruce Lee, the Shaw Brothers, and other kung fu movie badasses. By sticking to this style, the characters don’t have much to say; instead, their emotions are conveyed via zooming in on wrinkled eyebrows as the film’s threatening music sirens.

Opening on Uma Thurman’s beaten face, we’re slowly told how and why it’s bloodied and bruised. Flashbacks are revealed over the course of the entire film, but basically Thurman was pregnant and near marriage when the Deadly Viper Assassination Squad (unexplainably shortened to DiVAS) ambushes her. A team of assassins she was once a part of, they are led and advised by the title character.

Comparable to Patricia Arquette’s bout with James Gandolfini in True Romance, the scene is horrific and difficult to watch, yet sets the tone for the rest of Kill Bill. Known only as The Bride, Thurman’s character miraculously survives and lays in a coma for four years Hard to Kill style, before randomly awaking with a shriek in a hospital of shadows. Revenge is immediate and the red tides are a flowing from here on.

She ventures off to a small house in the suburbs and confronts one of the assassins (Vivica A. Fox) in a knife fight as seen in the modest trailer. From here, she jets to Tokyo, where she battles a more mysterious and dangerous lady-killer (Lucy Liu), protected by a band of masked ninjas. The chaos is pushed full throttle and the camera is thrown into fun mode, resulting in astonishing movements and ridiculously long and well-choreographed shots.

As The Bride, Thurman is enthralling to watch, all confidence and slickness, which adds up to an indestructible feeling that hovers over the character like a comic book superhero. Watching her decapitate hundreds, literally, of towering Japanese fighters with a single, thin bladed sword is obviously surreal, but this is purposeful in case you think otherwise. The other casting choices are solid, as always for a QT epic. Fox is surprisingly effective during the adrenalin-fueled knife fight, and the Net head despised Liu actually nails several intense scenes with perfection. Eighties poster girl Daryl Hannah (Splash), Michael Madsen (Reservoir Dogs), and David Carradine (“Kung Fu”) have characters who will develop much further in Volume 2, which is said to incorporate more of a Sergio Leone-style western feel.

Miramax’s dictator Harvey Weinstein has become nefarious for shredding directors’ films into tighter and more marketable packages – see Gangs of New York. But Tarantino is the golden child, and is spared such cuts, in favor of a, perhaps risky, two- volume set. Yet, on screen it’s amazing that this was merely a business afterthought, as Volume 1 ends with such a satisfying cliffhanger – it seems totally natural. When Weinstein announced the game plan, the media jumped on the change as a sign of weakness. In fact, it’s the correct choice, because subjecting an audience to three hours of nonstop mayhem would only result in people jabbing each other in the aisles with sharpened candy bars – and you thought seeing Friday in the theatre was bad.

While a few slow spots early on keep Kill Bill from claiming a flawless victory, it stands as an exciting and enjoyable welcome back piece for Tarantino. Oscar will surely look the other way, but this flick will go down as one of the more intense and impressive films of the year. Someone start the countdown to February.

Shawn Wines can be reached at shawnwines@aol.com.

As NASTY as they wanna be: Big booties and big muscles at Opium

Something steamy was rising in the air last Sunday night and we’re not talking about the heat. South Beach’s Asian-infused lounge, Opium, turned into a hip-hop soir

art review: BIG FOOT SIGHTED at OBJEX ARTSPACE!

Sven is L&A’s Bike Writer

OBJEX, Miami’s “I’m-so-dope-I-make-my-own-clothes” favorite gallery for art whose fans can’t afford it, has moved closer to the devilish Design District that they are trying to undermine and outshine. Yeah, that’s probably pretty far-fetched but you wouldn’t know anyway because I didn’t see any of y’all UM chumps at the last opening, not that I was hoping too. Far more interesting is figuring out who’s vibing you and who’s wishing they would have jocked your style earlier.

Everyone’s been in the position of feeling like the world’s looking down their six foot nose at you, unless your mom wins Latin Grammies on the regular and you spend your afternoons bitching at your unintelligible hired help; it’s just funny seeing it coming from people younger than you.

Yellow Ferraris aside, last weekend was a chance for famed SF artist BIGFOOT to get some coast-to-coast connecs as a dozen or so pieces debuted on the fresh white walls over on 36th street. Also present (by the looks of the “homie” picture on the wall) was work from one of Biggie’s cronies whose name has been efficiently erased from my memory, but whose work will live forever in the spirit of my five illegitimate children, whereabouts unknown.

The Foot has been gracing Frisco’s walls for years with his scrawled signature and, on occasion, a yeti face/body/complete package. As a gallery show would indicate, the stee-lo had to be dee-lowed by at least 63 percent, resulting in a bunch of comic book styled paintings and prints of manageable sizes, with more work from Se