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42nd Street Boasts Nostalgia

The Miami Hurricane
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It’s a piece of old Broadway nostalgia, it’s a bit of Chorus Line, it’s a touch of Flashdance, and a dash of Cinderella .

The University of Miami’s newest show, 42nd Street, opened Friday night to the sound of 32 sets of tap shoes dancing in unison. That alone was enough to leave the audience (a full house) awestruck. The playbill cover had promised, “a toe tapping musical extravaganza.” It didn’t lie.

42nd Street is an historical view of Broadway, circa 1933, but no one comes to this play for a history lesson. They come for the music, the dancing, the comedy and the story of the unknown girl who makes it big.

Peggy Sawyer is the unknown dancer from Allentown, Pa., who dreams of the lights on Broadway. After missing an audition, she is picked off the street to fill out the chorus line. Peggy is ecstatic, but fate isn’t done with her yet.

Jessica Greeley shines as Peggy, and the audience just fell in love with the innocent country girl who stumbles through rehearsals and trips all the way to stardom.

But naive Peggy is no match for Dorothy Brock, the reigning Broadway star. Although the producers think Dorothy is past her prime and not right for the lead, they are forced to cast her because of her financial connections. Dorothy’s sophistication and cutting comments are a nice contrast to Peggy’s sweetness.

Nicole DeCario, who plays Dorothy, is perfect in the role. She shows just enough street smarts to be arrogant, but not enough to be villainous. The audience cheers for Peggy over Dorothy, but Dorothy shows true New York-style in the end.

Julian Marsh, the show’s producer, needs to have his play, Pretty Lady, score big. This is 1933, the Depression years, and Julian was hit hard by the collapse of Wall Street. His reputation as “the King of Broadway” is also on the line, so Julian is juggling lots of things.

Benjamin Gamble amazes the audience with his very real portrayal of Julian. His voice, his posture, and his mannerisms bring Julian to life. At times the audience feels like a member of the cast or crew – all focused on the “King of Broadway.”

The choreography was everything to this play, and the true star was the choreographer, Clay James.

No musical can be a musical without music, and 42nd Street has great music. The orchestra is the heart of the show, keeping it beating throughout both acts. Old favorites such as I Only Have Eyes For You, Lullaby Of Broadway, and the show-stopping 42nd Street are rejuvenated through the young voices of the UM cast.

42 Street’s last shows will be April 16-21 at 2 and 8 p.m. For more information, call (305) 284-3355.

Tickets are $18 for Friday and Saturday nights and $16 for weeknights, Sunday evening, and matinees.

Intramural Scoreboard

The Miami Hurricane
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SOFTBALL
Sunday 4/7

Absolute Zero – 3
Hui Aloha – 1

We’re Arrogant – 5
The Rednecks – 0

UMSM – 8
Superfly – 2

Foul Balls – 5
Axis of Evil – 2

We’re Arrogant – 10
UMSM – 4

Axis of Evil – 10
The Rednecks – 1
Superfly – 9
Foul Balls – 8

Tuesday 4/9

Master Batters – 10
Insomniacs – 5

86ers – 13
SECS – 4

UM baseball travels with diamonds

The Miami Hurricane
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In 1994 Denise Morris, wife of Hurricane baseball coach Jim Morris, began a tradition at UM when she came up with an idea to help increase support for Miami baseball after Hurricane Andrew had devastated and displaced so many local fans. She formed a fan club that began with about a dozen people.

Today the club is still active and they call themselves the Diamond Darlings – Diamond Studs. The group’s main purpose is to support the team and carry out special events throughout the year.

The current head of the organization is Lois Kerr, recognized at Mark Light Stadium as one of the most decorated and spirited UM baseball followers. To everyone else she is simply known as Lois.

In this year’s baseball media guide, head coach Jim Morris said: “Lois is relentless in her passion for the University of Miami baseball program. Her dedication and work is much appreciated by the team.”

Last weekend the club participated in a three-day excursion to see the ‘Canes take on arch- rival Florida State in Tallahassee.

This was the second trip for two UM die hard baseball fans Liz Rios and Katie Inderbitzen, seniors at Miami.

Even though they are graduating this year, the two already have plans of returning in the future.

“I am already planning on coming next year,” said Inderbitzen.”And I will be in California for graduate school.”

Upon arrival at the stadium, the club mingled with some of the UM players, giving words of encouragement and good luck.

“It is refreshingly delightful,” said Ellafae Cockroft, mother of Hurricane reliever J.D. Cockroft. “I believe that friends and family are some of the most important things in helping these young players achieve all of their goals in life.”

The fans gave their full support to the ‘Canes throughout game one, despite the FSU 13-3 win

Despite the loss, after the game the team and the group ate pizza together until their fill, with everyone having a good time. Lois paraded around making sure everyone had what they wanted with shouts of, “Kevin, we have cheese and pepperoni over here, Jim we got mushroom over there, Danny would you like some cookies?”

On Saturday, after an afternoon of touring the sights along the streets of downtown Tallahassee, the club once again was off to the stadium for game two. This time the ‘Canes put up a much better front against No. 10 FSU and pulled away with a 5-2 victory.

“It was great,” said Hurricane fan and trip co-coordinator Stu Glassman, “and George pitched just like George,” referring to Hurricane closing pitcher, George Huguet, who shut down the Seminoles in the late innings.

On Sunday, the team traveled back to the stadium to what would be a much anticipated series wrap up. What wasn’t anticipated however, was the extra four innings the team would have to play to finally decide a winner.

Four and a half hours from UM starter, Kiki Bengochea’s first pitch, Steven Drew, FSU rookie sensation and brother of current St. Louis Cardinal J.D. Drew, put a dagger into the hearts of the UM fans and players by smashing a game winning three run home run deep over the right field fence.

With a weekend of extremely competitive baseball now in the past, the bus started for home.

“My favorite memory of these bus trips was coming up here to Tallahassee last year and sweeping the Seminoles at home,” said Rios.

On the ride home in keeping with tradition, any fans who were participating in their first bus trip were forced to sing a song of their choice. Also, lucky numbers were drawn, giving away numerous prizes courtesy of All-Sports. Money raised goes towards future Diamond Darlings – Diamond Studs events.

Eventually the bus pulled up to campus at the tone of 3:00 a.m. and a very tired group left for home.

After a week of rest, the Diamond Darlings – Diamond Studs start up again tonight however, as the same Florida State Seminoles come down to Mark Light Stadium in the second half of the home and home series.

Todd Widom shines despite team’s poor play

The Miami Hurricane
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The University of Miami men’s tennis team has had a tough season. Coming into this weekend, the Hurricanes sit at 8-8 overall, but they have had one bright point — the play of freshman Todd Widom.

Widom has been ranked as high as No. 12 in the nation and he currently sits as the No. 16 player in the country. Widom is 14-2 in league play, which is no easy task.

“Todd has been a very pleasant surprise. Going 14-2 is not easy to do,” said men’s tennis coach Jay Berger.

Perhaps the biggest surprise about Widom’s success comes from Todd himself. Widom knew he was a very good tennis player, but he had no idea that his success would come so soon.

“I didn’t have many expectations coming into the year,” said Widom. “I didn’t know where I was going to be in the lineup.”

Widom’s tennis success started well before the University of Miami. His favorite sports memory is from high school, when he won the National Claycourts in Kentucky while having the entire crowd against him.

“All I had was my mom and a coach there. I had to battle a rough crowd and it made winning so much sweeter. . . I am definitely a fighter, I never give up,” said Widom about his victory in the National Claycourts.

The J.P. Taravella high school graduate from Coral Springs, FL has taken his tennis game to Miami, where he is just grateful for the opportunity that Miami has given him.

“Todd happens to be one of the nicest guys you’ll meet,” Berger said. “He appreciates this opportunity at the University of Miami. He takes nothing for granted and works hard every single day.”

Widom does not have many expectations, but he does have some goals that he set for himself. First, he wants the team to win. As far as for himself, Widom has accomplished the goals that he set for himself as a freshman at UM.

“I wanted to be an All-American as a freshman and I wanted to play in the NCAA Tournament,” said Widom.

Widom will represent UM in men’s singles at the NCAA Tournament. As the No. 16 player in the nation, he will be a definite threat to come home with the singles title. Perhaps the best thing about Widom on the tennis court is that the best is yet to come. He will continue to improve and will be even better for UM next season.

“I expect him to dominate college next year,” said Berger.

Mari Toro tears up competition

The Miami Hurricane
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Mari Toro’s father probably never expected much from his daughter after he introduced her to the game of tennis when she was just six years old. But now at the age of 22 she has by far exceeded his expectations and risen to become one of the top college players in the nation.

The sophomore from Miami grew up playing tennis with her older sister, Tari Ann. It is doubtful they will ever be compared to pro tennis sisters Venus and Serena Williams, but the two competed against each other in many tournaments when they were younger.

“She beat me most of the time,” Mari Toro said with a laugh. “Sometimes we’d have to play each other in the finals.”

Toro had no problem playing against her sister, noting that she was always trying to catch up to her playing level.

Not only did Mari Toro enjoy contending against her sister, but she also hoped to be coached by her someday.

After graduating from The College of William and Mary, Tari Ann Toro became the assistant coach for the women’s tennis team at the University of Miami. The same year, Mari entered her freshman year at FIU.

Despite finishing her first season with a 24-8 overall record, Toro was not comfortable playing for the Golden Panthers.

“I wasn’t happy at FIU,” Toro said. “I wasn’t happy with the team and the coach over there.”

Things soon changed for Toro, as her wish of having her sister as her coach came true when she had the opportunity to transfer to the University of Miami.

“I’ve always wanted to be coached by her,” Toro said. “Simply because she is my sister and she knows me so well.”

Having Tari Ann as a coach was not the only reason why Mari transferred to Miami.

“I knew [Miami head coach Paige Yaroshuk] is an excellent coach and Miami is an excellent school,” Toro said. “The tennis program and work ethic is just so much better over here.”

Toro came to the Hurricanes competing for the No. 1 spot against senior Marcy Hora. She earned the spot right away and finished the spring 2002 regular season last Sunday with a 6-4, 6-3 victory over Notre Dame’s Becky Varnum.

The win improved her record as a sophomore to 22-9 overall – all coming from No. 1 singles.

Even though this is only her first year at the University of Miami, Toro believes she has gained respect from teammates and coaches.

“I know the girls look up to me because I’m a hard worker and I try my best,” Toro said. “But I wouldn’t consider myself the leader of the team, we are all leaders.”

The Intercollegiate Tennis Association has recognized Toro’s accomplishments this year. She is currently ranked No. 66 in the nation for singles by the ITA.

This is not the first time Toro has been ranked. Despite only playing one year of scholastic tennis in high school, Toro went undefeated in singles play. She was ranked in the top five in Florida for girls 18 and under and was also named to the All-Dade County tennis team while competing in No. 2 singles. Toro also played volleyball and softball in high school.

The women’s tennis team will hold a week of practice before they host the Big East championships from April 19-21.

Toro is confident the Hurricanes will bring home a Big East championship. She hopes that the team will finish the season in the nation’s top 15.

“After [the BIG EAST tournament] comes regionals, which is pretty tough,” Mari said. “But anything can happen.”

Sports Briefs

The Miami Hurricane
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MEN & WOMEN’S TRACK & FIELD

The University of Miami will host the 16th Annual Miami Gatorade Track and Field Classic tomorrow at Cobb Stadium. Field events are scheduled to begin at 9 a.m. with track events starting at noon. The meet will be the final home track event of the season for the Hurricanes. After the meet, Miami has road meets in Gainesville and Philadelphia before the Big East Champion-ships, which take place May 3-5 in Storrs, Connecticut. Joining the Hurricanes at this year’s Classic will be a strong field including Bethune-Cookman, Florida International, Kansas State, St. John’s, South Florida, Tulane and Villanova.
ROWING

This past weekend, the University of Miami women’s rowing team split up to compete in two separate events, the San Diego Crew Classic on the west coast, and the FIRA State Championships in Tampa. The Hurricane Varsity Women’s eight competed in the San Diego Crew Classic, placing 12th in the prestigious invitational Jessup Whittier Cup. In the event’s petite final, the University of Miami women finished in fifth place with a time of 6:57.49, ahead of the US Naval Academy (7:06.43) and Tulsa (7:11.73). Meanwhile, on the East Coast, the remaining team members competed in the FIRA State Champion-ships. The Hurricane Women’s Varsity Eight was edged out in a narrow finish by the Varsity Eight from the University of Central Florida. The day was additionally highlighted by a win by the junior varsity four. The crew gained immediate control of the race and won going away in a time of 8:02.1, nine seconds ahead of the next crew from the University of Central Florida (8:11.7). The Hurricanes captured an additional two silver medals in the women’s Freshman/Novice Eight and Four events. The Hurricanes will race again on April 20-21 at the Southern Intercollegiate Rowing Association Championships in Oak Ridge, Tennessee.

WOMEN’S
SOCCER

Tonight, Miami concludes their spring schedule with a 7 p.m. match at FAU Glades in Boca Raton. The Hurricanes are coming off a 10-9-1 overall record last season, including a third place finish in the BIG EAST Northeast division. Additionally, Miami made a NCAA Tournament appearance for the first time in school history. The Hurricanes will also be aided by six new freshman in 2002, all of which are members of the Region III and Region IV Olympic Development Programs (ODP) teams and pools. The signing class includes Ashley Durkee (Ft. Lauderdale, Fla.), Jackie Garcia (Miami, Fla.), Jessica Keller (Highlands Ranch, Colo.), Jyene Mack (Ventura, Calif.), Lindsey Yach (Carrollton, Texas), and Brittani Zonker (Littleton, Colo.). The regular season begins at home against Stetson on Aug. 30.

Hurricane baseball on the bubble

The Miami Hurricane
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For Hurricane seniors like Javy Rodriguez and Brad Safchik, this weekend marks the final time they will have a chance at defeating Florida State at Mark Light Stadium.

This weekend’s series, however, has a much bigger meaning for the team as a whole. The Hurricanes enter tonight’s contest with an 18-15 record, and with six weeks to go in the regular season, are in danger of missing the postseason for the first time in nine seasons under Coach Jim Morris.

“I hate to hear the words on the bubble, but that’s where we are right now,” Morris said. “We have to play well for the rest of the season in order to get in, and we’ve talked about that.”

Last weekend, Miami dropped two out of three to the Seminoles in the front end of a home and home series. Florida State routed Miami in the opener, 13-3, as Hurricanes starter T.J. Prunty lasted just 2.2 innings, giving up seven earned runs on five hits, while walking four and hitting a batter.

Morris, who moved Rodriguez over to second and inserted freshman Paco Figueroa at shortstop to start Friday, put Kevin Mannix back in the lineup as the designated hitter for the remainder of the series, replacing Matt Barket.

Mannix went 1-3 Saturday, but Miami was able to get help from pitcher Dan Touchet, who pitched a Hurricane season high 7.2 innings, allowing six hits, two earned runs, and striking out six en route to a 5-2 victory. At one point, Touchet pitched to 20 consecutive Florida State batters without giving up a hit.

“The difference maker in the series was us getting a great performance from Touchet, which gave our guys more confidence,” Morris said. “He kept us in the game and we did what we had to in order to win.”

Miami dropped the finale 9-7 in thirteen innings, as Stephen Drew hit a walk-off three-run homer off Vince Bongiovanni. The Hurricanes ultimately dropped the game, but did get a decent performance from starter Kiki Bengochea, who threw six innings, giving up four earned runs. Safchik also hit his first career home run, a grand slam, which gave Miami a 4-2 lead early on. Safchik was one of many Hurricanes to hit the ball well over the three-game stretch, but the senior gave the credit to the Miami pitching staff for helping them rebound from Friday’s loss.

“The pitchers stepped it up a notch,” Safchik said. “Their(FSU) hitters get on top of the plate so we starting adjusting to that, and the pitchers threw a lot more strikes and stopped walking people and that is what kept us in the game.”

Tonight, Prunty gets the start for the Hurricanes. After a 4-0 start, the sophomore right-hander has dropped each of his last two decisions, and with Troy Roberson still out due to injury, Prunty looks to solidify his spot as the temporary No.1. The rotation remains the same this weekend, as Touchet will pitch tomorrow, and Bengochea is scheduled to finish off the series. Morris will also go with the same lineup as last Sunday, keeping Rodriguez at second, and Figueroa at short.

“We’re trying to get the best defensive team out there on the field,” Morris said. “Right now, Paco has been playing very well at short and Javy does a great job turning two.”

Paco’s brother, Danny, solidified his spot in center field after a 4-4, two RBI performance in Saturday’s victory. The freshman outfielder is confident about facing the Seminoles for the second time in two weeks.

“When we play together as a team, we’re a hard team to beat. We’re focused on this weekend, and we’ve been practicing on the little things because doing the little things are what will win us ball games.”

According to Morris, the team hasn’t talked about specific goals for this weekend. However, the players understand the significance of the series, and the impact it may have on Miami’s postseason chances.

“This is the biggest weekend of the year for us,” Safchik said. “We know that we have to start winning two out of three games every series in order to make regionals.”

Green fundamentalists

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Two weeks ago the University Center Breezeway was filled with the sounds of true believers, gesticulating wildly and chanting a mantra that has become the lingua franca of the latest version of the movement. “Who are these fundamentalists?” you may ask. Radical Islamo-fascists? Jews for Jesus? Air Force ROTC? No. They are none other than the Greenpeace faithful, who had returned to entice inexperienced young students into the ranks of the anointed or simply shake down guilt-laden sympathizers to fill the coffers of their secular internationalist religion.

In this world religion, dissention is not tolerated and dissidents are cast away from the fold, so I watched and listened carefully as each recruiter earnestly displayed his or her revolutionary commitment in demonstrative rhetoric. I had my own epiphany years ago as to the true intentions of this cause so I braced myself to endure another assault on reason and human ingenuity.

I’d walked by several times and spoken with the faithful during my last two semesters observing their regular migrations back to UM and, like Canadian or Eurasian migratory loons, they had returned to the fat and ample breeding grounds of South Florida. I notice these annual migrations and the subtle means they use to recruit on university campuses throughout the United States. You may have noticed also and no doubt, a few of you were recruited as foot soldiers in their war by these recruiters to the faith.

The ones I had talked with were not UM students. That’s not to say that UM doesn’t have Greenpeace bishops or imams attending classes, but these adherents were clearly outside churchgoers. So I geared up and reveled in the debate until the point early in the discussion where things invariably turned to nonsense. An attempt at reasoned discussion with a true believer is never an easy task but I thought I’d have a try with a weathered copy of the Skeptical Environmentalist by ecologist and statistician Bjorn Lomborg and another gem called Damned Lies and Statistics by Joel Best.

It seems that Lomborg and Best, now exiled and reviled environmental heretics, reveal much suppressed empirical evidence and data that exists, which challenge the manipulative and deceptive techniques, as well as some of the preconceived notions flouted by these zealots. Much of his primary source data comes not just from other environmental scientists who have been banished to the bowels of their biology and chemistry buildings in order to keep their jobs, but from economists and statisticians as well.

Now, environmentalists have always cast a jaundiced eye at economists because they have a nasty habit of challenging false assumptions using measurable or historical facts. Environmentalists don’t like economists because they inhabit the worlds of the GDP, trade balances and price indices. It is not the more emotionally urgent and easily grasped world of tapped out aquifers or dying ecosystems, favorites here in South Florida. During one part of our discussion, I tried to explain to a few of these ‘green’ ground troops that they were relying on a “fixed coefficients model” that assumes a constant relationship between input and outputs. They measure these over only a very short period of time and assign the cost of environmental harm as infinity in terms of that same measurement. This highly inexact model never allows for technological change or substitution of resources and or application efficiencies that become standard with the passage of but a few years.

Clearly we have pressing issues with pollution, changes in weather patterns and other environmental concerns that require appropriate attention and responses with prudent and rational policies. But these require rational trade-offs using finite resources, not the destruction of capitalism or by herding the whole of humanity into cities. Religious ecological zealots like many in Greenpeace seem unwilling to consider these very real terms because part of their dogma insists that environmental damage is infinite, i.e. irreparable. I had expected a reasonable discussion, complete with some compromise toward workable solutions with these true believers. Nope. They would have none of it and I could see that my presence could easily create some discomfort with the head table apparatchik watching a prospective new labor force and potential funding source being poisoned by my heresies.

Greenpeace displays many trappings of anti-capitalist organizations susceptible to the embrace of environmental mysticism and anti-modern notions of primitive culture. The pull is strong especially when we see the beauty of nature and actually touch its handiwork. But I wasn’t wasting any more of my time. I walked away shaking my head detecting the low ethereal and enchanting hum of von Goethean ‘departure’ and Gramscian ’emancipation’. “K-y-oto…K-y-oto…K-y-oto…Save us.”

Steven Stanley is a graduate student in the School of International Studies.

Equal rights for all sexual orientations

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In September, registered voters in Miami-Dade County will vote on a controversial no-brainer: whether or not to repeal the county’s 1998 Human Rights Ordinance. The county mandate prohibits discrimination in “housing, credit and finance, public accommodations, and employment” on the basis of “race, color, religion, ancestry, national origin, sex, pregnancy, age, disability, marital status, familial status or sexual orientation.”

In a replay of what happened in 1977, social conservatives launched a petition drive a couple years back, hoping to force a public referendum on the future of the local legislation. After some controversy about suspicious irregularities on the petitions, the local elections department certified the petition drive, thus setting the stage for a critical autumn vote.

Opponents of the ordinance are seized by an irrational fear of homosexuality. But since ideological backwardness is growing increasingly unpopular in educated societies, some ordinance foes have embraced an alternative strategy that smacks of utter miscomprehension of scientific evidence. Consider a quote from a leading ordinance foe in the 2/9/00 edition of The Miami Herald: “Establishing homosexuality as a civil right would be akin to establishing alcoholism as a civil right.” The author of this analogy aims to confuse.

According to the Encyclopedia of Psychology published by the American Psychological Association, mainstream psychology “regards homosexuality as an alternative form of sexuality that is not associated with pathology.” Furthermore, “it seems likely [on the basis of empirical studies] that a wide variety of biological, psychological, social and cultural variables … contribute to sexual orientation.” Put another way, while scientists are still learning about the causes of homosexuality, they agree that homosexuality is not a disease.

According to the same publication by the same august organization, alcoholism (as opposed to alcohol abuse) is characterized by “repeated or compulsive use of alcohol … plus indications of physical and psychological dependence.” Furthermore, scientific studies of the origins of alcoholism show that the “strongest risk factor for the development of alcohol-related disorders is a family history of alcoholism.” Put another way, alcoholism is a debilitating ailment-a disease-with a strong genetic component.

I believe the foregoing analogy between homosexuality and alcoholism is poor. Although both behaviors are governed by a complex interaction of genes and the environment, alcoholism is basically a disease by virtue of its deleterious physical and behavioral effects while homosexuality is a benign lifestyle with no inherently harmful consequences.

In terms of our civil rights, a better analogue for homosexuality is…religion! Both are non-pathological lifestyles, neither of which should be used as grounds for unfair treatment. Everyone knows that humans have an unhappy history of discriminating against others on the basis of religion. But pretending that homosexuals aren’t also unjustly disparaged and discriminated against is suggestive of sheer, unadulterated bias.

Significantly, with regard to sexual orientation, the ordinance exempts religious institutions from treating people equally within the confines of supposed houses of God. That is presumably why many faith groups do not object to the amended ordinance.

This ordinance rejects preferential treatment on the basis of sexual orientation and many other criteria. Rather, it calls for fair treatment, which rational individuals should find totally unobjectionable. Significantly, the amendment to the ordinance is not stated in terms of gay-rights. Instead, it outlaws unfair treatment on the basis of any sexual orientation. I find this comforting: Even if all employers, landlords and creditors of the world magically become homosexuals, then this noble ordinance would still protect heterosexuals like you and me from pernicious discrimination.

Raj Singh is a junior majoring in philosophy.

The idiot’s guide to Spanish

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A four-part formula for learning Spanish in Miami:

A study abroad student who recently arrived at UM from Singapore walked in the study abroad office and asked, “Is the native language in Miami Spanish or English?”

When I got here last summer, the Spanish words were in my head, they just seemed to like hanging out there so much they never came out of my mouth. These days I’ve accelerated my skills to picking up Costa Rican guys with my roommate using the following flawless formula.

STEP ONE – RRRRRomance:

You know how when a radio station plays the same song over and over again it usually gets annoying? In this case it’s helpful – if you don’t get the lyrics the first time, you can be absolutely assured they’ll play that song five times a day for the next three months, so you’ll catch them eventually. I do get no end of ridicule from one of my friends though. She swears only her mother and her pregnant cousin listen to Romance, WRMA 106.7. I can live with that.

STEP TWO – You can get anything on the Internet:

Ever felt it would be easier to speak a second language if you didn’t actually have to speak the language? Instant “messenging” is the answer. You never sound like the white guy on the beach in Cancun wearing black sandals with his tube socks pulled up too high; because you’re not actually speaking, the pressure’s off. So find a pen pal, invent a personality, and go for it.

STEP THREE – Those who can’t do, teach:

A few months ago, my boss asked me to tutor a kid in a second-year Spanish class as a refresher before the school year began. I agreed, with the proviso that at some point in the not too distant future he would exhaust my knowledge of the language. This happened at the end of the first tutoring session. When the kid came home with his first A in Spanish, however, I was suddenly elevated to the level of goddess of Spanish grammar. Cramming for a Spanish exam is nothing compared to cramming for a tutoring session where you’re going to help a kid cram for a Spanish exam.

STEP FOUR – La Cucaracha, La Cucaracha:

We’d been living in our apartment about two days when the cockroaches invaded. My roommate doesn’t like cockroaches. She attacks cockroaches with a can of Raid, a broom and dustpan, or a furiously whirring vacuum cleaner, whatever is available. Humberto, our maintenance man, does nothing. Well, he doesn’t do nothing. He earns his keep as a conversationalist, telling us, in Spanish, about his daughter’s prom date, his eye for women’s dress sizes, and why he quit drinking. He does nothing about the cockroaches, but he’s great as a Spanish tutor.

I have worked as an English teacher for years, but I never realized until now that how much of a second language you actually learn may depend on how many love songs you listen to, whether you hook up with strangers on the Internet, how bad some kid thinks his real teacher is, or how many dates your apartment maintenance guy’s daughter has. While picking up Central American men may not be not an official step in the formula, should you follow the steps I have outlined above, you too can pass the Spanish proficiency exam and go on to a fulfilling career as a cocktail waitress in a tiki bar on a beach in Acapulco.

Angie Henderson is a graduate student in the School of International Studies.

News Briefs and Campus Calendar

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YEAR BOOKS
To the graduating seniors of 2002, To cover significant spring events and sports, including commencement, the staff of the IBIS in conjunction with the Board of Student Publications has decided to deliver the 2001-2002 IBIS in late August via mail. To receive a copy of the yearbook, you must go to the Student Section of the IBIS webpage (www.miami.edu/IBIS ) and input the address where you would like to receive your yearbook. Seniors who register before May 1, 2002, will not need to pay for shipping. Those registering after May 1, 2002, will be charged for shipping (approx. $4.50 in the United States). If you have any questions, please e-mail IBIS@miami.edu and a member of the yearbook staff will answer in a timely manner.

2002 EXCELLENCE IN TEACHING AWARDS
The office of the Provost and the International Advancement Center are pleased to announce the 2002 Excellence in Teaching Award recipients:
Sanjeev Chatterje, School of Arts and Sciences, Broadcasting
David Janos, College of Arts and Sciences, Biology
Bruce Miller, College of Arts and Sciences, Theatre Arts
Arun Sharma, School of Business, Marketing
Donald Spivey, College of Arts and Sciences, History
Maria Stampino, College of Arts and Sciences, Foreign Languages
Kay Tatum, School of Business, Accounting.

HOUSING SIGN-UP
The deadline for current students to sign-up for on-campus housing for the 2002-2003 academic year is Friday, April 19th. Beginning on April 22nd, current students requesting on-campus housing will be placed on a waiting list should a vacancy become available. To apply for on-campus housing, visit the Department of Residence Halls office-Room. 153 in Eaton Residential College. For more information, call (305) 284-4505 or e-mail housing@miami.edu mailto:housing@miami.edu.

WORKS OF MICHELANGELO ON DISPLAY AT
SCHOOL OF ARCHITECTURE
School of Architecture students will display dozens of drawings and models inspired by the Renaissance figure Michelangelo through April 18 at the School of Architecture Gallery. The School of Architecture Gallery is free and open to the public 9 a.m. – 5 p.m. Monday through Friday.

APRIL IS NATIONAL STI AWARENESS MONTH
The Wellness Center will be distributing condoms and educational information in the Breezeway every Thursday during April between 11-a.m.-1p.m. to celebrate national STI Month. For more information on STI’s or condoms distribution, please contact 305-284-6524.

MENINGITIS VACCINATION CLINICS OFFERED IN BREEZEWAY
Student Health Center will be offering meningitis vaccinations in the Breezeway throughout the month of April for $49.99 (compared to the regular price of $70). Clinics are scheduled for April 11, April 18, and April 25 between 11:30a.m. to 1:30p.m. Cash or check will be accepted at the breezeway Clinics. Vaccines will be offered at the Student Health Center throughout the month of April for students who can not attend clinics.

Sign-up for on-campus housing!

Today
Hui Aloha: Pacific Night tonight at 6:30-10p.m. on the UC Patio with Hula, Polynesian revue, craft sale, authentic Hawaiian food, DJ Sage, door prizes and more…

Kids-N-Culture: Want to be a mentor for a day? Sign-up for Kids-n-culture and hang out with the 4th graders from Little River Elementary from 9a.m.-3p.m. today. For more information call 305-284-GIVE.

The Committee on Student Organizations (COSO) is accepting applications for the 2002-2003 year. Interested in getting involved? Pick-up an application in UC 209, the STIC. Applications must be returned by today. Need more information? Check out our site at www.miami.edu/coso.

I-WEEK: “Carnival” – Caribbean Day on patio from 12p.m.-5p.m.

I-WEEK: “Onipa’a Kakou” – Pacific Night on patio from 7p.m.-10p.m.

I-WEEK island party at the Rat from 10p.m.-2a.m.

Sun April 14
Alpha Kappa Alpha is having A Splash of Pink Pool Party from 2-5p.m. at the UC pool as part of their “So fresh and so clean pink and green” skee week

Alumni Appreciation Week
(April 15-22 there will be Alumni Trivia Contests from 10a.m.-2p.m. in the UC Breezeway).

Mon April 15
Summer housing sign-up starts today.

Alpha Kappa Alpha will have a Green Apple A Day, Health forum as part of the”So fresh and so clean with pink and green” skee week at the Wellness Center from 5-7p.m.

Alumni in training lunch on the UC patio from noon (free lunch to first 300 students).

Tues April 16
The annual Greek Community Polishing Ceremony which honors outstanding students, professors, and administrators, will take place today at the Faculty Club. For more information call Dean of Students Office at 305-284-5353

Alpha Kappa Alpha is having a movie night at the Rathskeller at 8p.m..

Distinguished Alumni Lecture Series featuring Barry Richard, AB’64, JD’67 at 6:30p.m. at the Lowe Art Museum. RSVP by contacting Office of Alumni Relations at 305-284-2872.

Earth Alert is holding its annual Earth day celebration “Earthfest” from 1a.m.-4p.m. on the UC Patio.

Wed April 17
Alpha Kappa Alpha Sorority Inc. : A part of the “So fresh and so clean with pink and green” skee week there will be a poetry night at 8p.m. at the Rathskeller.

The Living Wage Coalition will be holding a Living Wage Speak-Out and demonstration on the Rock from 11:45a.m.-12:45p.m.

Thurs April 18
The Greater Miami’s Hillel’s Isreal Programming Council will be hosting Yom Ha’atzmaut (Israel Independence Day) at UM from 11a.m. until 2p.m. today on the UC Patio.

Alpha kappa alpha is having a Mr. So Fresh and So Clean, male auction from 7-9p.m. at the UC International Lounge.

Free Princeton Review Practice Tests (for seniors only) : MCAT, LSAT, GMAT, GRE) at 11a.m. Please RSVP the Princeton review at 305-662-1464.

Hurricane Productions welcomes film director John Waters to campus at 7p.m. for a lecture at The Storer Auditorium. The lecture is free to students and $10 at the door for all others. For more information call Hurricane productions at 305-284-4606.

Fri April 19
Alpha Kappa Alpha is having a Pinkyland at the Rock from 11:30a.m.-2:30p.m. as part of their “So fresh and so clean with pink and green” skee week.

Sat April 20
Alpha Kappa Alpha is having a B-B-Q at 2-5p.m., location to be announced.

Student ‘reject’ art show debuts

The Miami Hurricane
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Salon des Refuses was the place where late 19th century Impressionist painters exhibited their works when they were rejected from The Academy, according to art student Marc Johnson.

The Alternative or Egalitarian Art Show, presented by Salon des Refuses and organized by Johnson, is being put on in the same strain, he said.

The show, taking place on Friday, April 26 at 7:30 in the Rainbow Building, will be exhibiting student art works not accepted by the annual student exhibition at the Lowe as well as others.

“With the exception of the yearly Lowe art show, there is nothing for the art students. There should be a monthly, rotating exhibition and whoever wants to exhibit their work should be able to. One showing is not enough,” Johnson said.

Johnson, as well as other art students, are putting together the show because they believe that there should be a greater forum for art students to exhibit their work, he said.

“A lot of really interesting art doesn’t get into the mainstream exhibitions,” said art professor, Kathleen Staples. “This is a terrific opportunity to see the exciting work our student artists are doing.”

“[The Alternative Art Show] is a long time overdue,” said art professor Walter Hines. It has been 10 years since the last student-run student exhibition was held, he said.

“I believe a student run exhibition can be better than a juried, official show. Hopefully, if this event goes well, student exhibitions will become a recurring event,” Johnson said.

He also said he hopes that this showing will be the first step towards a greater appreciation for the arts on campus.

Johnson contrasted the lack of interaction amongst art students with that amongst those in the School of Music.

“The music students have great opportunities. There are recitals concerts nightly,” he said. “Hence, the students not only get a chance to see performances, but interact with their peers outside the classroom.

“This interaction is an important part in the process of learning and I feel that the undergraduate are students are deprived of such opportunities,” he said.

“It is important in art for students to take their own initiative,” Hines said.

“I would like to see the community more interested in the arts, and the and the artists and the art department taking more initiative in displaying work,” Johnson said. “We are taking it upon ourselves to exhibit the unaccepted. There is talent on campus, but we will never know if we are not given the opportunity to exhibit.”

All student art works will be accepted as long as they are submitted by Wed., April 24. The Rainbow Building is located on 1540 LeVante Ave, behind the Titanic Brewery.

For more information please contact Marc Johnson at m.johnson7@umiami.edu.

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