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New Kid on the Block

This past Friday night, Miami’s elite gathered behind red velvet ropes awaiting the opening of State’s opaque double doors. This invitation-only premiere boasted Miami’s eminent alongside the Beach’s distinguished and reputable in all that is fashion, music, entertainment, nightlife and the arts.

Sharing a sidewalk with known spot Rumi, State is located on 320 Lincoln Road, giving way to its 12,000 square feet of sumptuous velvet lounges, three bars, two floors, and one lavish, bravura chandelier dangling from the vaulted ceiling.

Past the opaque doors, the foyer models an Ocean Drive magazine cover poster, welcoming guests as the host of the party. Models clad in period style reminiscent of the 1700’s pranced throughout the night to the rhythm of the music. The soiree started off with retro soul hits mixed such as Michael Jackson and Barry White and made its way till the after hours with European house beats, hip-hop and R&B playing in the Goldbar. State’s lineup includes the Thursday Night Party with music by Mark Levanthal & Juan Mejia, Fridays with music by Nicky Scanni, Pierre Zonzon & Chilly, Saturdays with music by Ivano Bellini, Pierre Zonzon & GiGi, and Sundays L’hip-hop c’est CHIC featuring Radamas spinning R&B, Hip Hop and Rock N’Roll with DBJ in the Goldbar.

This discotheque not only caters to the music enthused and society pages, but also to the art scene, showcasing mannequins clothed in fashion garments along with pieces of art distributed throughout, though mainly amassing in “the gallery” around the main dance floor upstairs.

Friday night’s gathering gave way, namely, to this metropolis’ older socialites, distinctive to an invitation-only celebration. But don’t be mistaken – plenty of young partygoers could be seen carousing in their mini skirts, stilettos, shirts and ties with a trustworthy drink in hand.

This new locale will attract all, from the attention starved [Paris, of course] to the been-there done-that clubber seeking a revitalized outlet to the monotony and ennui of SoBe nightlife. See for yourself and you decide if State’s happenin’.

Christie Asencio can be contacted at c.asencio@umiami.edu.

Briefs

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Equestrian

The University of Miami Equestrian Team placed fifth overall with 23 points last weekend at the University of Florida horse show on Jan. 24. In the Open Over Fences event, Nicole Grassi placed fourth and Jessica Beavers grabbed fifth place. In the Open Under Saddle event, Sarah Trent earned the victory, and Grassi placed sixth. In the Intermediate Over Fences event, Amy Stewart seized fourth place and repeated that performance in the Intermediate Under Saddle competition. In the Novice Over Fences competition, Halle Sheade won, and Kristina Moser placed third. The Novice Under Saddle event saw a second place finish by Juli Diamond and a fifth place finish by Megan Salazar. On Sunday, the Open Over Fences event saw a third place finish to Sarah Trent and Jessica Beavers, while the Under Saddle event was won by Trent. The Intermediate Over Fences event yielded a sixth place finish by Stewart, as did the Under Saddle event. The Novice Over Fences event saw Moser place third again and Salazar fifth. Finally, Moser, with Lara Radoicic placing fifth, won the Novice Under Saddle event. Halle Sheade received Reserved High Point Rider at the Saturday show.

Women’s track

The University of Miami women’s track team climbed two spots to No. 12 in the latest Trackwire Rankings released on Tuesday evening.

The Hurricanes received 19 total points to tie with Colorado for the No. 12 spot.

Miami moved up two spots from No. 14 in last week’s rankings after an impressive performance at last weekend’s Gator Invitational in Gainesville, Fla., that saw three school records fall. Junior All-American Lauryn Williams broke the school record in the 55-meters with a time of 6.70 seconds, automatically qualifying her for the 2004 NCAA Indoor Track and Field Championships. Senior Adrienne Moss topped the Miami weight throw record, which she also owned, with a throw of 17.13 meters and sophomore Melanie Schultz broke the UM record in the one mile run with a time of 5:01.87.

The 12th-ranked Hurricanes will return to action on Feb. 13-14, traveling to Fayetteville, Ark., to take part in the Tyson Invitational.

-Compiled by the sports information department

Women’s tennis opens with win

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The 2004 season for women’s tennis started with both rain and victory. The Hurricanes defeated West Virginia in a shutout victory to open their season last Sunday afternoon. Anxious to play since their first game of the season versus Florida Atlantic was rescheduled due to nasty weather at the Neil Schiff Tennis Center; the women had more than desire written on their face, but the need for competition.

“We just wanted to get in here and play,” junior Megan Bradley said.

Miami dominated the doubles matches, which led to a 1-0 advantage before singles play began. Bradley and sophomore Melissa Applebaum defeated Melissa Day and Jennifer Watkins of West Virginia 8-3. The dynamic senior duo of Sihem Bennacer and Sara Robbins defeated Courtney Howell and Ashley Constantine 8-3.

The combination of experience and determination from senior Mari Toro and freshman Audrey Banada led to the defeat of Raynie Theis and Kelly Walsh in an 8-2 victory.

Toro was especially excited about this match.

“This is my last first match since I am a senior, and to come out and win [is great], and the day was just so beautiful,” she said. “I was mentally ready to go, and I think we all displayed that today.”

In their singles’ matches the Hurricanes swept through all six contests, winning in straight sets. Toro went on to beat Watkins 6-0, 6-1, and No. 11 Bradley defeated Day (6-1, 6-0), who she had also defeated in the doubles match-up.

Bradley was excited to start the new season with a win that would help their freshman, Banada, sophomore, Natalie Mikolich, and new assistant coach, David Anderton, “get acquainted with the game before we encounter the tough part of the season.”

Anderton, who just started with the Hurricanes, said “it was easy to come into a team coached by Paige [Yaroshuk]; it was such an easy adjustment for me. It was too bad we didn’t play yesterday because of the weather, but it was great to start with a win today.”

Banada displayed her talent in defeating Constantine 6-4, 6-1. Bennacer went on to defeat Kelly Walsh 6-2, 6-2 and No. 99 Staci Stevens defeated Howell 6-4, 6-4.

No. 97 Melissa Applebaum played the match of her life in defeating Theis in a 6-0, 6-0 shutout victory.

“We practice hard enough; I just hope I can keep playing this well until the end of our season,” Applebaum said.

“It is always great to start with a win under your belt; it gives the freshmen some experience and pressure,” Head Coach Paige Yaroshuk said. “I’m very proud of them; it’s always just a great feeling to win.”

The victory allowed the Hurricanes to improve to 5-0 all-time versus the Mountaineers. The No. 22 Hurricanes will now continue their season by hosting No. 68 Florida Atlantic University (FAU) Friday at noon at the Neil Schiff Tennis Center.

“It’s great to start strong, but more importantly [is] how you finish,” Applebaum said. “If at the end of the season we play as well as we did today, then our hard work has finally paid off.”

Antoinette C

Berry making splash as freshman

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Tom Berry, a freshman runner on the men’s fall cross-country team and spring track team, knows what it takes to win in different types of meets.

Running is a year-round commitment for Berry, who emphasized that as the basic criteria for a successful running season. A truly successful runner recognizes the importance of relentless training.

“If I don’t train, I know somebody that I will be competing against is training,” Berry said.

Berry said that consistency is an important goal for any runner to work towards, as a consistent runner is more likely to avoid faltering during the long season.

This was never more evident in Berry’s running than during first semester, when he regularly kept his time in the 8000-meter in the 26-minute range with a season’s best time of 26:02.42 at the FIU Invitational. His performance in that race earned him a second place finish.

Berry was initially a baseball player back in high school, but over time he realized where his best chance to compete in college was. His realization and eminent switch to competitive running was necessary, but he will always remember his baseball days as immensely enjoyable.

“I wasn’t very good [at baseball],” Berry said. “I still enjoyed playing it when I was younger, however.”

The two opponents that Berry looks forward to facing the most are Villanova and Georgetown, because there are old high school rivals of his that participate on the track programs at these respective schools. He has also revealed that there are some old high school rivals that he will be pitted against when the University of Miami’s entire athletic program moves to the ACC in the 2004-2005 school year.

Berry began his running career during his freshman year at Westhill High School in Stamford, Connecticut, where he not only honed his craft as a skillful runner, but also realized his passion for movie producing.

Along with his many accolades in running, including being named the Most Valuable Player on his cross-country team and the Fairfield County Interscholastic Athletic Conference Championship at the 1,600 meters (4:21), he has received awards for his expertise in film.

Berry’s fascination with film originated in his middle school years, where his blossoming passion for visual arts was encouraged by a teacher-initiated History Day. During History Day, Berry and a few of his friends developed a short film that, at the time, was nothing more important than a good grade. Shortly afterwards, however, Berry realized that he wanted to be a filmmaker at some point in his life.

Berry was honored at the Director’s View of International Film Festival, where his film Fragments of Recollection finished in second place. His other independent film, Divination, received sixth place honors at the Marco Island Film Festival.

Berry’s enthusiastic and realistic attitude towards his track and cross-country exploits and academic endeavors shows that he has the makings of a true champion in both collegiate competition and the film industry.

Larry Nolan can be contacted at l.nolan@umiami.edu.

Braun hopes to live up to lofty expectations

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Shortstop Ryan Braun’s first season with the Hurricanes was an overwhelming success, but that has not stopped the sophomore from working tirelessly during the off-season to improve.

As a true freshman in 2003, Braun led the ‘Canes in six offensive categories, including batting average (.364), home runs (17), and runs batted in (76). The Granada Hills, California native was named National Freshman of the Year by Baseball America.

This season, with the Hurricanes expected to contend for the College World Series title, there is immense pressure on Braun to be one of the nation’s top hitters.

“He had a great year and he is our leading hitter offensively right now,” Head Coach Jim Morris said. “He can steal 20 bases and we all know he has a great chance to hit 20 home runs.”

Braun said he has not been affected by the national attention he has received.

“There are lofty expectations but at the same time, I don’t think there is any added pressure,” Braun said. “The ranking at the beginning of the year doesn’t mean anything; it is where you are at the end of the year that matters.”

Despite Braun’s superior offensive output last year, he was not satisfied with other aspects of his game, and he has focused most of his off-season training to becoming an all-around superstar.

“I’ve gotten much faster than I was last year, so more bunting and steals should help me,” he said. “I’ve also gotten better defensively than I was last year.”

Braun’s success has even caught the eye of Texas Rangers shortstop Alex Rodriguez, who has reached out to Braun and offered advice.

“I have a tremendous amount of respect for A-Rod; he is around here all the time, so I have had chances to talk to him and had a chance to watch his work habits,” Braun said.

While at Granada Hills High School, Braun won the team’s Most Valuable Player Award three times, breaking the school record for career home runs with 25. As a senior Braun was rated the sixth-best shortstop prospect in the entire country by Team One Baseball.

Braun made the Athletic Director’s Honor Roll during the fall semester last year, priding himself on maintaining strong marks in the classroom while managing an extremely busy schedule. Although Braun is constantly earning rewards and praise for his prowess on the diamond, he continues to be a grounded and amiable person off the field.

“I am outgoing; I am very personable, and I am a people person,” Braun said. “I love interacting with people and doing pretty much anything with people.”

This upcoming season will be the Hurricanes’ last before joining the Atlantic Coast Conference. Although the ‘Canes will be forced to play a tougher regular season schedule, Braun sees only positives in the move to the ACC.

“The ACC will be an advantage; the better competition we play, the easier it will be to adjust to the post season play,” he said.

The Hurricanes are ranked near the top of every preseason poll and will be favored to win almost every series they play this season. However, Braun is firm in believing that the veterans on the roster will make sure the ‘Canes aren’t cocky about their preseason accolades.

“I don’t think this team is overconfident,” he said. “We have not done anything yet on the field. Our ranking just shows we have the potential to have a good season.”

Eric Kalis can be contacted at e.kalis@umiami.edu.

PLAY BALL Baseball Season Preview

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Last season, the Hurricanes were a young, unranked team who surprised everyone by earning a trip to Omaha. This year, the ‘Canes enter the season with national title aspirations.

The high expectations are due to the fact that the team returns every starter for the first time in Head Coach Jim Morris’s 26 years in college baseball.

“I’ve been coaching a long time, and I’ve never had every starter returning to the lineup. Especially when you have a good club, that is very unusual,” Morris said. “We finished fifth last year but we were so young, so no one expected us to be in Omaha.”

Along with the returning starters, the ‘Canes will introduce a couple of new faces like junior college transfer Brendan Kaitin and freshman Jon Jay.

“Brendan Kaitin, a junior college transfer, is a big strong guy, a right handed hitter that can hit the ball out of the park,” Morris said. “He is a really strong hitter who will be in the lineup as an outfielder or a designated hitter.”

The key to the team’s success this season might lie in simply staying healthy. The squad has had a laundry list of injuries to deal with already.

“Our injured list looks like the football team’s list with all the guys we have banged up,” Morris said.

One of those guys is Danny Figueroa, who was the starting centerfielder and leadoff hitter last year. Figueroa is expected to be out until late April due to a shoulder injury that required surgery in September. His injury leaves a void in centerfield and at the top of the lineup that the Hurricanes will need to fill. One of the possibilities is using his twin brother, Paco Figueroa, in centerfield.

“Saturday night [in the alumni game], my plan is to start Paco in centerfield so that it will look like Danny,” Morris said. “He has played really well; he can run, gets great jumps on the ball, and we have been playing him out there a lot in practice.”

Other injuries include Brian Barton, who has been bothered by an elbow injury, and Ryan Braun, the 2003 Freshman of the Year and leader in all three major hitting categories, who just got cleared to play after having a sore elbow most of January. Braun’s 76 RBIs last season were tied for fifth on the ‘Canes all-time single season RBIs list and a record for a freshman.

An Ace and a Leader Return

One of the injured players that the ‘Canes are thrilled to have back is last season’s ace Dan Touchet. Touchet was 2-0 last season with a 1.93 ERA before undergoing Tommy John surgery in early March. Having a healthy Touchet will add depth to the Hurricanes’ pitching staff.

“Dan Touchet is pitching with no pain, which is huge,” Morris said. “He isn’t back to where he was, but I am confident that he will be back there soon. He could pitch right now, but we want to bring him along slowly.”

In addition to Touchet’s comeback, the return of fifth year senior Jim Burt is huge for the Hurricanes. Burt started every game at first base last season and hit .296 with 11 HR and 40 RBIs. He provides veteran leadership and a work ethic that all of his teammates can follow.

“Burt leads by example,” Morris said. “He got hit in the mouth and didn’t want to come out of practice, but the doctors wouldn’t let him play for a few days, so he was out there in shorts and a t-shirt leading the stretching. Even today, he was here at twelve o’clock.”

An Improved Staff

The ‘Canes’ pitching staff should be one of the best in the nation with Cockroft, Vince Bongiovanni, and Brandon Camardese joining Touchet as starters. George Huguet returns for his senior season as the team’s closer and Cesar Carrillo will be the set-up man.

“No one is really taking charge on who the No. 1 starter is. All three guys are struggling with their consistency right now, but it’s early,” Morris said. “In the bullpen, Huguet will be the closer, and Carillo will be the set-up man.”

Carrillo is a guy the ‘Canes have high expectations for. He throws a fastball consistently in the 90s and has a powerful arm.

“He has the best stuff on the staff so he can do anything we need him to do. He could be a starter or a closer or anywhere in between,” Morris said. “He throws over 90 [mph] with an outstanding breaking ball. If you ask our hitters who the most intimidating pitcher on the staff is, they will tell you Cesar.”

Sean Valdes-Fauli will begin the season suspended indefinitely for violating a team rule. Despite the loss of their long reliever, this year’s pitching staff should be among the nation’s best.

“The expectations on our pitching staff are greater than last year. We have the experience of playing in Omaha, so our goals are a lot higher,” Cockroft said. “We have specialist guys in the bullpen, and everybody has experience. I think there is more confidence on everybody’s part that if they don’t have their best stuff one day, that the other guys will pick them up.”

A Tougher Workload

The Hurricanes will play their usual tough schedule this season, with games against powerhouses Tennessee, Georgia Tech, Long Beach State, Florida, and of course, a home and away series with Florida State.

“We have a really tough schedule with an RPI in the top three, but it is the last time we get to play all those games at home,” Morris said. “I did that on purpose because I knew it would be our last year playing all these games at home due to the move to the ACC. We will have to play 36 home and 20 on the road in the ACC, but I still think the move to the ACC is a great move for the athletic program and UM, even though I am losing my home games.”

One of the keys to this team’s success will be to remain focused and not get overconfident due to their high pre-season rankings. They are ranked Nos. one or two in all of the polls and look to be one of the teams to beat this season.

“This team is confident, maybe too confident, which scares me,” Morris said. “I tell them to remember that we are ranked No. 1 by the same poll that didn’t rank us last year, so the rankings don’t mean anything. We have good players and a chance to be good but you have to work hard and get better everyday.”

Evidence of this team’s depth can be seen by looking at the middle infielders. They have senior Adam Ricks and Braun, but they also have Joey Hooft and Paco Figueroa, and Morris feels that all of them deserve to be in the lineup. However, depth is a good problem to have.

“We have a lot of good players who work as a team and win as a team. It makes filling out the lineup card hard,” Morris said. “We are very solid and our guys work hard on fundamentals and playing the game the way it’s supposed to be played, and that gives us a chance to win.”

Darren Grossman can be contacted at d.grossman@umiami.edu

Throwing around ‘Nazi’ shows lack of reason

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It seems to be a feature of the modern political discourse to label anyone who has ideas some consider to be too strict, a Nazi. Or if someone speaks in language others think is too deliberate, unless you’re a liberal, that person must be sporting a distorted pagan symbol for good luck under their jacket.

This type of slandering is beginning to reach critical mass among the intellectually weak who seem to have found their natural environment among the anti-Bush forces.

This knee-jerk bashing isn’t limited to our side of the pond, however.

Last year an official of the German government accused President Bush of using Hitler-like scapegoat tactics in his foreign policy. Setting aside the fact that Germans are the very last people on Earth who should be slinging around the Hitler comparisons, I thought it was instructive in showing that Americans aren’t unique in their ignorance of their own history.

Last month’s publicity stunt by the super-hip, Clinton-era refugee group moveonintogeorgesoroslap.org, sponsored a contest to develop the best anti-Bush ad, with a submission being displayed on the group’s website comparing Bush to Adolf Hitler with phrases like “God told me to fight Al Qaida.”

Without rehashing the entire episode, it would seem that the super-cool, super-trendy people at moveon.org are saying that when a non-liberal politician expresses a strong religious foundation to his thinking, that such a person is secretly professing a strong faith in Nazism. Listening to these people, they’d have us all believe that the USA Patriot Act is akin to the Nuremberg Laws, with John Ashcroft as a modern day Wilhelm Stuckart, author of Nazi Germany’s Nuremberg anti-Jewish laws.

Such a comparison fits into that ignorance category I mentioned above.

The problem with rhetoric such as this is that it desensitizes us to the real Nazis, such as the ones hanging out in Westland, Michigan, the headquarters for the American Nazi Party. And yes, they’re still around.

Besides that, there are plenty of groups around that actually act like Nazis. Examine this comparison: The Nazis had a supreme leader called The Fuhrer. He gave charismatic speeches and whipped his followers up into a frenzy. Some of those followers carried his picture, wore black uniforms and committed acts of extreme violence at his bidding. Today there are people who follow a supreme leader called ihe imam, or mullah. He gives charismatic speeches and whips his followers up into a frenzy. Some of these followers carry his picture, wear a black uniform and commit acts of extreme violence at his bidding. I mean, by moveon.org’s standards that makes these jihadist Muslims just like the Nazis. Right?

Now before some of you allow your blood pressure to pop out your eyeballs, understand that I’m giving an example of absurdity by being absurd. Obviously Islam has about as much in common with Nazism as democracy does, which is to say nothing. There is absolutely nothing in the practice of true Islam that advocates anything but the absolute opposite of anything remotely related to Nazism. And of course let’s not forget that jihad as it is actually espoused in the Qur’an has been brutally distorted by those who scream it all the time, using it as a default philosophy when its original intent was as a final defense arrangement for one’s community.

One could, of course, use any number of extremist group comparisons in place of jihadist Muslims, and the point still stands – one finds whatever one is looking for.

For people like moveon.org to be so blinded by their hatred of Bush as to think that he is anything like Adolf Hitler shows exactly how ridiculous and extremist they are. Kind of like the Nazis.

Scott Wacholtz can be contacted at s.Wacholtz@umiami.edu.

Jackson’s indecency unfitting for sports

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Tom Brady wasn’t the real MVP of Super Bowl XXXVIII this past Sunday. No, that distinction would belong to Janet Jackson. Or, more specifically, to her right breast.

Just leave it to the conservative media at MTV, in charge of sister network CBS’ halftime show for yet another year without reason, to find some way to stick a boob on television in front of a world-wide audience. Justin Timberlake, who had the honor of tearing off Jackson’s clothing in front of an estimated 100 million viewers worldwide, was supposed to be the surprise performer of the halftime event. It turns out he was just unveiling it.

“It was not intentional and is regrettable,” Timberlake said after the Super Bowl, labeling the incident as a “wardrobe malfunction.” Which, as far as I can tell, means he was also supposed to expose the spur-shaped metallic pastie covering Jackson’s nipple.

An MTV-issued statement said it was “unrehearsed, unplanned, completely unintentional and was inconsistent with assurances we had about the content of the performance.”

The lesson to be learned? No more cross-promotion in sports.

Think about it. Michael Jordan and baseball, the NBA/WNBA two-ball challenge replacing the Dunk Contest, Shaquille O’Neal and Kazaam. These events all foreshadowed Sunday’s collapse, and Viacom, which owns CBS and MTV, should be taught a lesson for allowing its children to procreate. Mixing music and entertainment with sports is a bad recipe.

Now, for the five of you still reading this article, you may be wondering, “Why don’t you offer some solutions?”

Now, for the two of you still reading this article, you may be wondering, “Should I stop reading this article?”

So here are some solutions. First, it’s the Super Bowl. You can get more relevant performers than Janet Jackson or Aerosmith.

Second, it’s the Super Bowl. You are allowed get more masculine performers than a former member of the Mickey Mouse Club. In fact, who says there even needs to be a musical performance?

Instead, let’s hope that the Super Bowl XXXIX halftime show features what we all have been waiting for come next year: Bikini Bowl II.

Ben Minkus can be contacted at b.minkus@umiami.edu.

LETTERS TO THE EDITOR

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Re: If the battle’s not over, why has feminism died?, 1/27

To the Editor:
I loved Horacio Sierra’s article in The Hurricane and I’m not even a UM student. I have applied to UM, and I read the paper to get an idea of what the student body is like. Your editorial assuaged my fears that all UM students are superficial and think Cosmopolitan, the example you chose, is more important than a textbook.

Gabriela Auon, Omaha, Nebraska

To the Editor:
Horacio, you’re absolutely correct. Our generation of women takes everything for granted and many don’t realize that inequalities between men and women still exist. A large part of the problem is as you said – women think that it’s a choice between standing up for women’s rights or being feminine and sexy, a choice between beauty and brains. For some I think they are simply scared of the consequences of speaking up, even if the consequences are unjust. Your column was also intriguing to me because I recently read a column in the New York Times on the exact same topic.

Jessica Hall

EDITORIAL

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It seems the only people complaining about Janet Jackson’s breast-bearing stunt at the Super Bowl are the couch-bound conservatives who have nothing better to do than decry the slippery slope of today’s haute couture.

In fact, if all of the 89 million viewers were asked if they liked Janet’s exposure, most of them will tell you it was brilliant. Especially the sun-shaped nipple shield. Great touch.

The vocal minority, like Federal Communications Commission [FCC] chief Michael Powell, are wetting their pants over such an outrageous display of indecency. “Like millions of Americans, my family and I gathered around the television for a celebration. Instead, that celebration was tainted by a classless, crass and deplorable stunt,” he said.

Did he forget that Janet was wearing a bondage leather outfit during her performance? What did he expect, a picnic?

The critics should lighten up. Sex sells. According to TiVo, this particular halftime stunt was the most replayed moment, not only of the Super Bowl but of all television moments the company has ever measured.

In his Lycos 50 Daily Report, Aaron Schatz wrote the brief flash of flesh has become the most searched-for event in a one-day period in the history of the Lycos search engine. It even beat out September 11.

In the world of college students, racier things happen on a daily basis, you can probably seen more skin on the girl next to you. Most of us are desensitized to nudity. In fact, most college kids embrace it. Some, whose parents have kept them naive most of their lives, have at times found it pretty difficult to fit in around here.

In fact, it seems the more sheltered a student is, the harder it is to enjoy college.

But the issue at hand is this: Will this stunt permanently affect our First Amendment rights?

Maybe. The FCC’s review of the incident will reportedly extend to the entire halftime show, which included crotch-grabbing moves by rappers Sean ‘P. Diddy’ Combs and Nelly and racy lyrics by rap-rocker Kid Rock. According to FCC regulation, “indecent” material cannot be aired between the hours of 6 a.m. and 10 p.m., right when the Super Bowl took over the airwaves.

So Janet’s lingerie slip-up is potentially a federal offense.

Only in America.

The FCC defines obscene as lacking “serious literary, artistic, political or scientific value.” Indecent material is not as offensive but still contains references to sex or excretions. Well, Janet’s jug has more artistic value than just about anything else we saw during halftime.

And the politics are deeper than any other national topics currently being tossed around. You don’t see “John Botox Kerry” as the most searched words on Lycos.

Furthering the frustration, the Grammys will now be aired on an extended time delay. It’s not “live” anymore. How long will these delays be? Who will be deciding what we can see?

The big wigs at CBS will. A select group of couch-bound conservatives who have nothing better to do than decry the slippery slope of today’s haute couture.

What’s next? Utopia?

POLICE BEAT

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WEDNESDAY JANUARY 28

8:13 p.m. 1230 Dickinson Dr.
Petit Theft

THURSDAY JANUARY 29

10:59 a.m. 1311 Miller Dr.
Grand Theft
3:29 p.m. 1306 Stanford Dr.
Theft
4:17 p.m. 1211 Dickinson Dr.
Grand Theft
4:59 p.m. 1231 Dickinson Dr.
Fraud

FRIDAY JANUARY 30

11:05 p.m. 5638 Merrick St.
Burglary

SATURDAY JANUARY 31

1:15 a.m. 5500 San Amaro Dr.
Theft

SUNDAY FEBRUARY 1

10:43 p.m. 5600 Merrick St.
Grand Theft
MONDAY FEBRUARY 2

12:42 a.m. 1231 Dickinson Dr. Battery
11:05 a.m. 5150 Brunson Dr.
Stalking
TUESDAY FEBRUARY 3

10:15 a.m. 1507 Levante Ave.
Theft
12:08 p.m. 1111 Memorial Dr.
Petit Theft
12:48 p.m. 1311 Miller Dr.
Theft
3:02 p.m. 1306 Stanford Dr. Burglary
For more information on crimes and crime prevention, contact Public Safety at 284-6666.

South Florida Blood Bank makes monthly visits to UM

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The South Florida Blood Bank [SFB], a nonprofit organization, comes to UM the first Monday and Tuesday of every month in hopes of attracting youths to help save lives. SFB is the only source of blood for Jackson Memorial Hospital and Ryder Trauma Center.

Studies show that one in 10 people will be a blood recipient during his or her lifetime. Because the nation is currently in critical condition in terms of blood availability, experts say anyone who meets the criteria for donating blood should.

During this month’s visit, they were able to collect about 60 pints of blood. Though this may seem like a lot, Magda Campoamor, representative from SFB, says this is only enough blood for one heart or liver transplant. It is often the amount of blood needed to treat injuries from car accidents.

“Every pint makes a difference,” Campoamor said, who donates blood every two months. “Plus, you never know when you’ll be needing blood.”

Donors like senior Dana Szpunar and junior Carolyn Vickers say that they try to donate as often as possible.

“Thirty minutes of my time can save someone’s life, so why not?” Vickers said as she finished donating.

Szpunar said further that the perks to donating blood, such as free shirts and a DVD player he won once, are “icing on the cake.”

The next blood drive will be during Greek Week.

For more information, contact Magda Campoamor at mcampoamor@sfbb.org or visit www.sfbb.org.

Shalu Patel can be contacted at s.patel16@umiami.edu.