On Tuesday, the U.S. pulled its ambassadors to Syria out of the nation and partially severed diplomatic relations in the process. Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice and other State Department officials made it clear that this action was a proximate result of the assassination of former Lebanese Prime Minister Rafik Hariri. State Department officials also mentioned that the Syrian military presence in Lebanon is impeding on the freedom of the Lebanese and in direct defiance of UN Resolution 1559. Read between the lines and its clear that, a) the administration has a strong belief that Syria either participated in or had knowledge of the assassination and b) there is going to be a stronger push to enforce the UN Resolution. Neither of these are good news.

This situation should scare the hell out of every single one of us; it is explosive and on a downward spiral. This is the type of situation that could easily be diffused but just as easily could escalate into a call for war. Condoleezza Rice is going to get thrown into the fire with her new job; her first major test is perhaps the most important test she will face in her term over the next four years. Lets all hope she can stop the hemorrhaging, but if it can’t be stopped, we must all be prepared to take and support further serious actions against Syria.

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On a lighter note, five Democrats, including sons of a standing member of Congress, were charged with slashing the tires of 25 GOP get out the vote vans on Election Day. They have since hired John Edwards to represent them, who is claiming they were all under the influence of Zoloft at the time. He has subsequently filed a civil lawsuit against Zoloft and three random doctors from his dartboard on behalf of the accused.

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The Federal Marriage Amendment was recently re-introduced on the Senate floor by Bill Frist and co.; Leave it alone Billy, Gary demands it. The name of this column is “Right On!” not “Republican On!”-in some instances the two don’t necessarily coincide.

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UN Secretary General Kofi Annan has appointed former President Bill Clinton as the UN Tsunami Relief envoy. I personally think it’s a great combination. Bill Clinton will undoubtedly be an incredible resource for the Secretary General, bringing to the table his ability to make huge disastrous scandals go away. Just when I thought they were going to get somewhere with the Oil for Food investigation, Kofi calls in the cavalry. Touch

I have had a revelation. The Right isn’t insane; it’s just callous. They are utilitarianists. They don’t see people (well, not after they’re born anyway); they only see numbers and the profit that they might harvest from those people. And that doesn’t make them nuts. It just makes them dicks.

I’ve had a hard time thinking about the War in Iraq in “Bush Terms.” I mean aside from all the lies about weapons of mass destruction and Saddam Hussein and Osama bin Laden being as tight as Bush and Fox News (or God if you really don’t believe FNC is in the White House’s pocket). They never talk about the human beings, American and Iraqi, soldiers and civilians, who are staining the sand red every day. It was stunning at first. Bush would go on television (or to a campaign rally back when we still had hope) and talk about some ludicrous picture of morning in Iraq. I didn’t get it. I knew he doesn’t read newspapers, but I figured he’d at least check out the Drudge Report or something once in a while. Then it dawned on me: He and his administration don’t really care. Lives are business costs. It’s like when a company launches a product it knows will draw lawsuits; it just factors the settlement costs into its bill. They expected lots of dead soldiers and civilians, and that’s why they don’t show them and don’t care about them.

It’s a simple case of cost/benefit analysis. Fifteen thousand-plus bodies are worth “freedom in the Middle East” to them. Well, we hope we’re fighting for “freedom” anyway. I don’t buy it. More likely, it’s about political capital or some crazy ultra-Christian crusade to make sure the prophecy of the Bible is fulfilled (oh please, please have religious motives! That would make this whole thing so much more fun to discuss in history classes in a couple generations!).

None of this really should be surprising. We see the philosophy of John Stuart Mill every day with conservatives. Well, kind of. They interpret “the greatest good for the greatest number” as “the greatest good for those with the greatest power.” Who needs to pay a living wage when you can save a couple of bucks per hour on every employee and buy a new yacht? Or a whole new marina? It makes sense to them. They “worked hard” for what they have, so it’s their right to not work to get some more. And that sounds pretty great and good to a lot of people who only care about number one.

Patrick Gibbons can be contacted at p.gibbons@umiami.edu.

The other day I had this crazy urge to use the bathroom. I know that this is an uncommon urge but it happens. Anyway, I decided that I would use one of the bathrooms in the UC. When I walked in I realized why that guy from American Pie ran home every time he needed to use the bathroom. The whole seat was full of urine. Living on campus, I guess I could actually run back to my dorm every time I needed the bathroom or I could write about it and hope to reach some people.

The parts of the men’s bathroom are absolutely wonderful. Since some people seem to not understand the different parts I am going to take the liberty to name them. First there is the toilet; it is used for “#2” which includes but is not limited to sitting down (which is why it would be nice to keep it clean). Now I understand that some guys are shy, get stage fright or just like the privacy of the stall, so it’s a good thing the inventors of the toilet installed hinges on the seat so it can be lifted when you are standing. Let’s move on. There is another amazing invention called the urinal. I know that in most bathrooms the urinals either equal or out-number the toilets. They aren’t that hard to use. Just stand in front of one, aim and shoot. Lastly there is the sink, for washing your hands. Now I know this is none of my business, but more people really should use this item. It is good for you.

My mom teaches kindergarten and I know for a fact that if one of her kids makes a mess they have to clean it up. Here we are on a college campus and I would expect the same. I consider this University my home, probably because I live here. I don’t pee on your toilet seats at home and I would think that you would not pee on the toilet seats in my home either. I fully understand that we have a wonderful UNICCO staff that cleans our bathrooms but they don’t clean after every user. So I plead with you, please if you sprinkle when you tinkle wipe it up! We are all big boys on this campus.

Justin Diamond can be contacted at j.diamond@umiami.edu.

Re: “Are we really living in a porn nation?,” 2/15

I am writing to you in response to your article found in our school newspaper, The Daily Anthenaeum. Before I start, I thought that it would be appropriate to share that I am actually involved in leadership with the organization Campus Crusade for Christ and that I also helped to promote the event “Porn Nation.” I wanted to let you know that I believe you have misinterpreted not only the reason for the outreach of porn nation, but also the meaning behind the outreach. I feel like you believe that “Porn Nation” was just a cheap trick by our campus ministry to bring a “new audience” to our weekly meetings. Well, coming from the source who helped promote it, this was not at all our intention.

I’m not sure that you are totally aware of what goes on for these types of things, but I would like to inform you that in the months leading up to this outreach in October, the entire ministry would meet in prayer and pray that this event would be beneficial to people on campus. Our goal was to reach people who might have had a skewed mindset (according to the Bible) on sexual behaviors, not to bring people into our ministry.

I just want to make you aware that our intention was not at all to use a “perfect hook” to bring people in. It was solely to inform people about the problems of masturbation and premarital sex. As far as the presentation goes, I, and I am sure Mike, will be the first ones to admit that the presentation was not all that great. We hyped this event up so much and to be honest we felt like it had a very small impact because of the bad presentation of materials. I felt like it may have even gone so far as to push people away from what we were trying to present them with. I’m sorry if the presentation and the things that were said there offended you. There is nothing I can do about that for you. I would like, however, to tell you that what he did say was truth. These things such as masturbation and premarital sex can lead to destruction of relationships and families. But I don’t want to preach to you.

Sincerely,

Adam Swiger

Student, West Virginia University

Re: “President Shalala talks Peace (Corps) with The Hurricane,” 2/8

I enjoyed reading your recent interview with President Shalala in The Hurricane. I, too, served as a Peace Corps volunteer and have very similar impressions of how it has changed my life. About a year after having graduated from UM in 1993, I embarked upon an amazing journey as a Peace Corps volunteer to teach English in a small, rural village in northern Thailand from 1994 to 1996. I taught English to the most amazing group of Thai students (7th to 10th grade) and still keep in touch with many of them today. I was the only foreigner, fluent in the local language who lived and worked in a small farming and wood carving village. Everyone knew me and looked after me as a beloved member of their family. (At times, when I needed to let loose, I was able to leave my village and travel an hour to a nearby city where nobody knew me just to play a game of pool and have a glass of wine, or go dancing with friends!) It was the best experience for someone open-minded, adventurous and with a sense of humor. If you didn’t begin your Peace Corps experience with an open-mind, a sense of adventure and a sense of humor, you certainly came home 27 months later with one! I learned a lot about myself, too, along the way and I certainly appreciate every step of the journey. I rode elephants in the rain forest, camped in tents and bungalows on exotic, isolated beaches, experimented with culinary delicacies like fried worms, and became proficient in the art of Thai karaoke. Where else can one experience such an amazing adventure but in the Peace Corps? I hope, and suspect, that your article inspired many Hurricanes to consider the possibility of joining the ranks of over 170,000 other fellow Americans and applying for the Peace Corps. It was the best decision of my life! Thank you again for interviewing my fellow RPCV, President Shalala.

Warm Regards,

Keri Gilford

UM Alum

Returned Peace Corps Volunteer

Thailand 1994-1996

Last week Confluence, a student arts and humanities journal, approached Student Government [SG] Senate regarding the placement of a referendum on the Spring ballot that would lead to a $0.25 increase in the Student Activity Fee, which would provide the journal with about $2,250 per semester. Senate, however, turned down the referenda with a vote of 13 in favor, 19 against and one abstention.

The SG Constitution states that organizations must receive approval from Senate in order to be placed on the ballot. Yet, while the statute was put into the SG Constitution to prevent frivolous referenda from bogging down the ballots, Senate limiting Confluence from having a chance at potentially gaining student support is unnecessary. After all, there is only one other referendum on the ballot-one for WVUM.

Granted, some of the concerns that Senate expressed were understandable. Mainly, the amount of money spent on Confluence’s annual banquet seemed excessive. Yet, Confluence will not be requesting funding for such extracurriculars. Additionally, Senate was concerned that few students actually read and submit articles to the journal. After all, there are only 300 copies printed and only 14 submissions were received last semester. This is a valid concern.

Yet, Senate also wanted to know why Confluence wasn’t doing more fundraising. To this we must ask, when was the last time you saw SG holding a bake sale? Student organizations should work to receive their funding, yes; however, few, if any, organizations are expected to support practically their whole organization on money from car washes and bake sales.

How well can the senators represent the student body if they obviously seem so out of touch? They turned down a referendum for Confluence, citing that it didn’t have enough impact on campus. However, in about a week, various senators and other students have gathered a petition with 500 signatures necessary to get the referendum on the ballot. This shows that students do, at the very least, want to have the choice to vote on the issue. Next time, Senate should check with their constituents before making such brash decisions.