What’s better than gaining 10 bodies in the span of a semester you may ask? Having a CRUSH! (The answer may be literally anything else but that’s so not the point.)
The goal of the crush is not to get in his pants. It’s to get in his brain, heart and then his pants. Switch up the order of operations.
Unfortunately, it’s much easier to take your clothes off than to admit you actually like someone. So we typically tend to skip a few steps.
Let this be the year we change that.
Don’t get me wrong, I love partaking in a one night stand. But, let’s be honest, nine times out of ten “one night stand” sex is the worst sex available.
Now this is where having a crush comes in. F**k everyone you want in the meantime, but find someone worth investing in.
Over time, this crush is meant to transform into the most valuable currency: good sex.
As horrible as it is to admit, the root of good sex is (unfortunately) an emotional connection. Whoever made that a thing should be sentenced to serious jail time — but I digress.
Finding out that emotional intimacy and physical intimacy connect is a hard pill to swallow — but you’re not a spitter … right?
Unfortunately, getting close to someone requires more than physical proximity. Through personal research, I have found that guys weirdly don’t fall in love with the girl they take home from Saturday pool parties.
Pick your crush wisely and take time to get to know him. Even if it takes being his friend first, the best foundation for a relationship is allegedly friendship. Entangle your lives, and if the connection starts to build and is reciprocated, shoot your shot.
The art of the crush is that it is casual. Don’t overthink it. You’re deciding if you want to get coffee with him, not if you want his last name. Give yourself permission to be interested without needing to know how it ends.
What if the feelings aren’t reciprocated, you ask? Then to hell with it. At least you put yourself out there. There are a lot of duds in the male population and plenty more men waiting for you to have a crush on them.
The crush is a current scapegoat in my life to try to build emotional connections. Being physical is fun … way more fun than being emotional, but at some point we have to put down our college hookups and situationships and deal with real relationships.
To me, the crush is the safest, most fun way to soft launch a transition from one to the other.
Join my movement of trying to transform sex from casual to meaningful. It may not be going perfectly for me, but what is a movement without a slightly unqualified leader?