Dealing with temptation

Dear V,

I am currently in a very committed relationship. I’ve been dating my boyfriend for about a year, and things are going fine. But lately, I’ve been hanging out with this guy from my calc class, and I think I’m starting to see him as more than just a friend. I think he feels the same way too, because the other night he was definitely being really flirty. And the worst part is that I was too! I would never cheat on my boyfriend, but I can’t ignore my feelings for this other guy. Please help!!

Dear Reader,

Let me just start off by saying the first thing that came to mind after I read your question: “Yikes.” I think that’s a good way to sum up your conundrum. But after some further thought, I think I have a pretty good answer for you. Or rather, a question that will hopefully lead you to an answer: Is your relationship really “fine?”

Because it kinda seems like maybe it’s not. It seems like there might be something missing. Maybe your boyfriend isn’t giving you what you want in bed. Or maybe he’s great in bed but really terrible at texting you back. Whether it’s physical or emotional, you need to ask yourself what this new guy has that your boyfriend doesn’t. There’s gotta be something— otherwise, you wouldn’t be so enticed.

Once you figure that out, you should have an honest conversation with your boyfriend to find out if communication can fill the void. If it can, then voilà! Relationship saved. If not, it might be time to move on.

Best of Luck,