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Sunday, February 25, 2024
February 25 , 2024

Sexual satisfaction on demand

The last time you were sitting in the library, diligently working on your English thesis or accounting project, you may have overheard some faint moans and screams coming from the speakers of your neighbor’s computer. Don’t be alarmed, for your fellow student may just be checking out the best thing to happen to the Internet since Google – YouPorn.com!

YouPorn.com was started a little over a year ago, and the basic idea of the site is to provide a user-friendly destination for “regular people” porn. This means that anyone, from the well endowed to the slightly less so can be found on the site, in hundreds of different positions and in thousands of different locales. The artistic freedom comes with a price, however. A sophomore who requested anonymity said, “I’ve seen some pretty offensive shit on there.”

Regardless, by functioning on relatively the same system as YouTube, YouPorn allows anyone to upload their own homemade pornography and showcase their bedroom scenes to millions of viewers. So instead of watching corny adult films with a plot and attempted character development, YouPorn enables porn to be what it’s meant to be – sex. Lots and lots of sex.

The best part of the site is that it’s free and attracts absolutely no viruses to your computer. Gone are the days of downloading shoddy videos for hours on end with Liwewire or BearShare and having the equivalent of major reconstructive surgery occur on your desktop every time you did so. Rather, users can log on, watch a few of their favorite videos (or even experiment with some new uploads), ejaculate accordingly and then go about their daily business. Thus, YouPorn has effectively taken the lag and inconvenience out of sexual stimulation.

Though the concept of YouPorn doesn’t seem exactly innovative, it’s the first site of its kind to rise to such popularity in such a short time. And the numbers don’t lie. Currently, YouPorn.com attracts just over 1.3 million daily viewers according to Web information company Alexa. Besides YouPorn being a hit in the covertly sex-obsessed United States, its traffic rank is in the top 50 in Greece, Mexico, Italy, Germany, Switzerland, the UK, Canada and several other countries. Indeed, in all of its glory, YouPorn attracts a global and diverse audience.

To some, YouPorn’s content is the exciting element of the site, but there are individuals who are equally as impressed with its business side. According to a student who also requested to remain anonymous, “YouPorn has really revolutionized the way you get porn. They used a great business model and they’re making a lot of money because it reaches so many people. I mean, I have it on my phone.”

Sophomore Federico Cybel also notes the ingenuity of YouPorn, “I think it’s a perfect way to get money. Nowadays people love porn, so it’s a smart idea.”

Either way, while sex is still probably the preferred outlet for the carnal frustrations of most college students, masturbation will never lose its personal and intimate feel. So put aside the relics and log on to get off at YouPorn.com. Trust me, you won’t regret it. But guys, make sure you don’t get too into the newest upload while you’re in public, because getting an erection while “reading your accounting notes” might just land you a nickname you’d never wish upon your worst enemy.

Dan Buyanovsky
Senior Writer

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